


If Heaven Really is a Place on Earth, it Sure as Hell Isn't Berlin

by NewYearsDay



Category: Carmilla (Web Series), Carmilla - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Historical, F/F, Laura's POV, Spies, no supernatural
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-22
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2020-05-16 08:40:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 39,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19314604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NewYearsDay/pseuds/NewYearsDay
Summary: 1987. The mission was supposed to be simple. Two CIA agents moderating a meeting between West German and British Intelligence. It was supposed to be a simple information swap. Agent Laura Hollis may have been green, but no one could truly prepare for the web of intrigue that was Berlin, nor the infuriating German agent who protected it.





	1. Although I'm Young, I've Got a Job To Do

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to my first fan fiction! It's lovely to have you here. 
> 
> I'm going to try to be as historically accurate as possible, even though I've already broken that rule once already. (See if you can spot that lol).
> 
> I appreciate comments of any kind, and thank you for reading.

“You ever been to Germany, Hollis?”

“No sir. 

“What about you, Lawrence.

“Yes sir. German was my minor at Yale. I spent a semester in Hamburg my sophomore year.”

“You can never resist bringing up how you went to Yale can you,” the commander barked at Danny. Laura subtly patted her shoulder, to let the taller girl know that at least SHE knew that Yale was impressive and that if Danny wanted to constantly bring it up, she would be supportive every time. 

“Sir I would really appreciate it if you didn't talk to me like that…” responded Danny. As Danny and the commander began to bicker, Laura allowed herself to be mentally taken out of the room and let her mind wander. Someone else would alert her when it was her turn to speak again, although she predicted that that wouldn't come for awhile. 

Laura wasn't sure what the relationship between her and Danny was. They were partners, just not the kind Laura thought she wanted. Laura met Danny Lawrence when she was entering her CIA training at The Farm and Danny was almost finished. They had become friends and once Laura had finished her training, Danny had requested Laura as her partner in stopping crime. That had been three months ago, and Laura was still foggy on what the actual nature of their relationship was, as well as what her job actually entailed. 

Regardless of the fact that they were both women, and regardless of the fact that they were coworkers, it was obvious that Danny was interested in Laura. Laura supposed that she was probably way more into Danny than Danny would be into her, and why wouldn't she be? Danny was gorgeous. She had at least a foot on Laura, had wonderfully vibrant red hair, and every feature, from her sharp nose to her incredible expressive blue eyes oozed a sense of confidence and personality Laura had never encountered before. The woman was only 26, but laugh lines already crinkled around her eyes every time she Danny smiled, which was often. 

“AGENT HOLLIS” 

Freezing in place, it was then Laura realized that not only had she been caught not paying attention, that she had also never removed her hand from Danny’s back, and had been toying with the tweed of the other woman’s suit jacket between her fingers for god knows how long. Laura slowly removed her hand from the offending article of clothing and turned to face her boss, an intense blush and a look of sheer terror rising on her face. 

“Y-yes sir?” Now it was Danny’s turn to comfort. Laura felt a hand brush across the back of her balled fist. She released her tensed hands and took a deep breath, “Please forgive me. What was it you were saying?”

The agents’ boss just rolled his eyes and continued to chew on his cigar. Laura wondered what that tasted like, but stopped herself from letting her thoughts float away for the second time. 

The boss leaned back in his chair and stabbed the cigar into the nearly full ashtray laying in front of him on the mahogany desk. Aside from the desk and the chair, the cushions of which severely weathered from years of use, the office was sparsely furnished. Beige walls were adorned with nothing except two framed photos: one of the man’s family, and one of him shaking hands with President Reagan. A large fern sat in the corner of the room next to the office’s only window. By the state of the plant it was obvious that the man did not actually care for it, and the fern was probably a suggestion from his wife to make his office feel more homely. It really made no effect either way. 

“As I was saying Hollis before I was verbally assaulted by your partner here,” their boss took a moment to shoot an annoyed look at Danny, the lines in his forehead deepening, making him look even more tired than he already had, “is that you're finally going to get out into the field. I'm sending you two to Berlin. West German intelligence has information pertinent to MI6, and the British asked to have us Americans moderate the exchange to insure nothing goes awry. Germany accepted the term, albeit reluctantly. Agent Lawrence,” he turned fully to Danny. She nodded at him to continue. “I believe you have worked with MI6 agents Perry and Lafontaine before correct?”

At the mention of the other agents, Danny’s mood seemed to perk up, “Yes sir and they were a dream to work with.” Danny smiled and Laura couldn't help but hide a smile of her own at the way her partner’s mood felt utterly contagious. 

This time, the commander turned fully to Laura, “Hollis, like I said, I'm aware that this will be your first time really working in the field and I think this is a good place for you to start for a couple reasons. First, these British agents are easy to work with so you won't have much trouble there. Second, it'll get you out of the country and get you out of my hair for a little while.”

“Wait sir what do you mean we’re going out of the country,” Laura asked quickly, her confusion quickly escalating into fear of the unknown. Next to her, Danny almost imperceptibly sighed. 

The man across the desk chuckled, pulling another cigar out of his desk and lighting it with a flick of the wrist. Her inhaled, and then leaned back and exhaled smoke right into the two women, careless as two anyone in the path of his cloud.

“Did I not mention,” he again, paused to inhale, then continued, the smoke pouring out of his mouth as he spoke like some kind of middle-aged, down on his luck, resigned dragon, “You and Lawrence are visiting sunny Berlin. Today is Monday, your flight leaves from Baltimore on Friday. I suggest you pack light. Checked luggage has a tendency to disappear once it gets to Schönefeld. Now get out of my office I'm tired of talking to you two. I'll have someone fax over the information to your desks.” He waved them unceremoniously out of the room.

“But sir,” Laura began to grow more frantic at the prospect of leaving without getting more information, “you haven't said anything about the German agen-”.

“Yeah well we don't want to talk to you anymore either,” Danny interrupted through gritted teeth. The taller woman grabbed Laura’s arm and dragged her away, effectively cutting off any other questions. Resigned, Laura allowed herself to be toted back to her and Danny’s adjacent desks. 

Laura signed and let her eyes scan over her work station. Her pens and pencils were neatly in their holder. On the desk sat a framed picture of her and her dad at her college graduation. The matching NYU diploma reverently hung on her cubicle wall for all to see. 

Danny’s desk on the other hand looked like it had been bombed out. The placard reading “Agent Danielle Lawrence” neatly sat at the front of her desk in its rightful place. Behind that however, was a constant cyclone of documents and post it notes. Sometimes the desk fan she kept turned it into a literal paper cut inducing tornado.. 

Danny puffed out her cheeks and smoothed the front of her smart white button-up. She inspected the knee of her pant leg and brushed it of dust, which Laura guessed was nonexistent. Unlike her desk, Danny Lawrence kept her appearance immaculate. 

“Danny he didn't say anything about the Germans we’re meeting,” Laura pointed out.

Danny glanced at her watch, “It’s almost 12:30. Do you want to get lunch? I'm thinking of seeing Ronald. 

“Reagan??” Laura was suddenly thrown by how abruptly Danny ignored her question and changed the subject. 

“No you dweeb. McDonald,” Danny teased. She placed her hand on Laura’s upper arm and gently squeezed in a friendly, playful manner. The air between them suddenly grew thicker, however, and although the color nowhere near matched her hair, Danny’s face grew slightly red. Both women knew that neither of them really wanted this touch to simply be friendly. The taller of the two cleared her throat and backed away slightly, a distance Laura found herself unhappy with. 

“Oh...right…” Laura laughed nervously, “But Danny the boss didn't say anything about the German agents.” 

Agent Lawrence now examined some of the case files strewn across her desk, seemingly looking for something without actually having anything specific she needed, “I’ll tell you what,” Danny glanced up briefly at Agent Hollis, “it shouldn't take more than half an hour for us to receive the full brief. We get the brief, take it with us, and examine it over burgers. I'm starving, aren't you?”

Thus, less than an hour later, Laura Hollis found herself sitting under Golden Arches and sharing a large fry with the woman sitting across from her, who scarfed down cheeseburgers like every bite took her one step closer to realizing the meaning of life. There they were, reading top-secret CIA briefs in the middle of a McDonald’s. It was inevitable that Danny got ketchup on her copy of said brief. Laura had to admit. Although the screaming child sitting two booths behind them was making it very hard for her to focus on the documents in front of her, the red and yellow interior was a welcome, if not gaudy change from the muted greys and browns of the offices. 

Laura returned her gaze to the piece of paper in front of her. It was the profiles of the of the British agents they would be meeting first, right away in the Berlin airport. Agent Lola Perry was dressed smartly in her official picture, red curled tucked up into a high and tight bun. 

“Perry’s alright. She's a little uptight, but extremely thorough, almost to the point of it being asinine. That being said, she takes great pride in her work.” How Danny managed to garble all that around yet another burger would be Laura’s eighth wonder of the world. Danny, finally, swallowed and continued, while reaching across the table to turn Laura’s dossier to the next page, “Laf is the one I really get along with. A scientist through and through. Lemme tell you. After hours, Agent Lafontaine and I have really let loose in London a couple times.” She winked. Laura stared back, a blank look on her face. Without responding, she turned back to the papers in front of her. Danny turned back to her burgers. 

Whereas Agent Perry’s picture had looked almost severe in how professional it was, Laura could tell that Agent S. Lafontaine would be much more agreeable to work with. Like Perry, they were dressed smartly, but this Lafontaine was smiling slightly, lines wrinkled around her eyes, much like Danny’s, thought Laura. Lafontaine had originally studied biology, Laura learned in her reading, but the British agent had for reasons unknown decided to pursue a government job. Laura made a note to herself to inquire as to why when the two of them met. 

A mumbled “oh shit” was heard from across the table and behind another burger. 

“What is it?? What's wrong?” Laura again became frantic. 

“Turn a couple pages to the section on the German agents. Skip Agent Belmonde you can go back to that later. Find the girl that looks better suited to a punk rock band than espionage. Her name is,” Danny squinted at the page, “...Camilla?”

Laura found the page in question. Danny was right. This woman DID look suited for punk rock. Again, another agent with an extremely severe expression stared back at her from the page. Agent Carmilla Karnstein, alias “The Countess”, was dressed completely in black, her dark brown hair laid messy past her shoulders and out of frame. If her eyes could talk they would say “I do things my way and that's just the way it's going to fucking be”. The only pop of color was the bright red lipstick “The Countess” was wearing. Despite all this, Laura for some reason couldn't tear her eyes away from the sharp cheekbones and perfectly sculpted eyebrows of the girl in front of her. This feeling her feel almost dirty, as Danny Lawrence, the object of her current affections was sitting not two feet in front of her, and so Laura pushed these thoughts away and forced herself to focus on the woman she was dining with.

“Danny why am I getting a terrible feeling from this woman just from looking at her picture alone?,” Laura asked slowly, as to control the waver in her voice. 

Danny took a sip of her Coke, “Well, I've never personally worked with her, but over heard from other agents that have that Carmilla Karnstein is a massive entitled bitch who's difficult to work with. Like a petulant child, someone said, but look at her profile. She's 25! I don't know. We’ll see how this goes, but if I'm being honest, I think our job just got a lot harder. I can just imagine the shit storm that's going to go down trying to mediate between her and Perry,” she gulped down another sip, “And to add to that, I've never even heard of Matska Belmonde. So that's another wild card.” 

Laura was speechless to Danny’s sudden tirade. Her companion seemed oblivious to her horror and continued to huff over the dossier as well as the container of fries. 

“Danny!” 

“Whaaat?” 

“This Carmilla person is going to ruin everything! This is my first real assignment and you've just told me in no uncertain terms that the mission has been messed with and practically compromised before it even starts!” Laura jabbed an angry finger into the face of the scowling German agent. “It says right on the page that she uses “unconventional methods”. What does that even mean?!” 

Laura collapsed in a heap on the table while it was Danny’s turn to be wide eyed with no words, “I just want to be good at what I do. I feel like I have something to prove. What kind of precedent does it set for myself if I fuck up my first major assignment?”

Danny reached across the table and again comforted her partner and rubbed her arm, “Hey it's ok. I'm sorry I reacted like that and scared you. You'll do great everything we’ll be fine. Maybe on the plane I'll tell you about my first big mission.”

This seemed to placate Laura as she raised her head out of her arms and tentatively gazed at Danny. Tears that had yet to fall shone bright in Laura’s light brown eyes. The younger woman sniffed, wiped her face with a napkin from her partner’s huge stack, and tucked a strand of matching light brown hair behind her ear. 

“Are you sure this will go smoothly?”

“Positive,” Agent Lawrence stuffed the rest of her last burger in her mouth and stood up to leave, “as long as you like bratwurst.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from Blondie's "Contact in Red Square".
> 
> I don't really know what my update schedule will be like, but I'll try not to make it too long.
> 
> Edited on 8/6/19


	2. Hold Tight We're in for Stormy Weather

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm back. Enjoy! 
> 
> Thank you for the kudos and comments!

The situation at the check in desk was dire. 

“Please. I will literally get on my knees and beg,” Laura began to sink to her knees as the woman working the airport ticket desk shot her increasingly concerned looks.Thankfully the spy remembered that she was in fact, in a highly populated public place and rose back to her full height, which, at only around five feet, didn't do much to counter how insane she must have looked. “All you have to do it check one more time. Two tickets from Baltimore to Berlin under the name Laura Hollis. That’s HOLLIS H-O-L-”

“How many times are you going to spell Hollis for me? I heard you the first time. I heard you the second time. I saw it with my own two eyes when you wrote it down for me to make sure I hadn't misheard you,” the woman, or “Linda” as her name tag suggested, cut her off, “You think I'm lying to you? You think I'm withholding information from you? For what reason? You think I WANT to keep talking to you Miss. “Laura Hollis spelled H-O-L-L-I-S make sure you don't forget the second L? Well I didn't forget the second L.”

“Now wait a minute for your information my title is Agent Hol-” 

“STOP TALKING,” Linda took a deep breath, steeling herself, and the vein receded back into her forehead, face being replaced by the vague smile of someone who has seen too much but keeps showing up to work anyway, “Ma’am you mentioned there were two tickets? Perhaps your husband could sort this out?” 

“NOW WAIT A MINUTE “LIN-DA”,”

“Laura I could hear you yelling from halfway down the hangar what is happening,” a third voice appeared, having returned from the bathroom. Danny turned to the woman at the desk, “I'm so sorry,” she squinted at the name tag, “Linda.”

“Don't use my name.”

“I apologize,” Danny resumed, having the presence of mind to look sheepish as to their current situation. Next to her Laura continued to practically vibrate with rage and Danny could hear her lightly counting down from 500 under her breath, “My friend and I supposedly have pre-paid tickets from Baltimore to Berlin. Business class. Have you checked under the name-”

“If either of you say Laura Hollis one more time I will put all three of us on a No Fly list”, Linda snapped. Danny’s mouth continued to hang open, poised to speak. Laura however, noticed that the woman was beginning to ever so slightly lose her edge, no doubt to how charismatic Danny could be without even trying.

Danny scratched at the back of her head, further displacing the already messy red locks. The tall woman was also wearing her glasses, electing not to waste time and effort putting her contacts in this morning. Laura admired how they made her look even smarter than she already was. The early morning was obviously taking a toll on all parties. Their flight left Baltimore at 5AM, meaning the two women had to leave D.C. at 2 that morning to make it to the airport with time to spare. Both Danny and Laura could sense that the line forming behind them would soon morph into a mob if the present situation wasn't quickly rectified. 

“Again, I apologize. Would it be possible that the tickets are under the name Danielle Lawrence? Let me show you some I.D.” The tall woman proceeded to pull her badge and government I.D. out of the pocket of her oversized, blue Yale hoodie and handed it across the desk. Laura’s knees buckled and her face sunk into her hands when she realized that she for one thing, didn't think to present an I.D., and two, didn't even bother to ask if maybe the tickets were put under Danny’s name.

And sure enough, “Yes, here we go. Two tickets to Berlin Schönefeld departing at 5 this morning. A window seat for Miss. Lawrence, and,” Linda handed Danny back the I.D. and smiled devilishly as if this was about to be the defining moment of her career, “a middle seat for Miss. Hollis.” Laura and Danny sighed in relief and discreetly high fived. “Do either of you have bags to check?” Laura and Danny shook their heads no. Taking the advice of their boss, both of them came only with suitcases small enough to carry on. Additionally, Laura carried her briefcase, while Danny brought along a very worn out looking backpack. Both agents reached forward to take the tickets. Linda placed both of them in Danny’s waiting hand, looked Laura square in the face, and screamed “NEXT IN LINE PLEASE”, spitting a tiny bit in the process. 

 

Quickly making their way through the airport, the women were surprised that despite the setback at the desk, it was still only 4AM, meaning they had an hour to relax at the gate. Laura and Danny basically crashed into a pair of seats, Laura pulled out the case files again while Danny pulled out a book and attempted to fold her large frame into a comfortable reading position within the confines of the chair, a trial that proved to be only mildly successful. 

“What are you reading?” inquired Laura, leaning over the armrest to peak at her companion’s book. Despite her best efforts, Laura couldn't pick out any words she understood and realized that the book Danny was reading was in German. 

“Doctor Faustus. It seemed appropriate,” Danny had a smug little smile on her face before she continued, “I couldn't find any adequate translations into English. Luckily for me,” she chuckled lightly, “the German is no problem.”

“Is that what they taught you at Yale?” 

Danny laughed a little louder and scratched at the skin underneath the arm of her glasses, not taking her eyes off the page, “Yeah one of many things that taught me at Yale.” 

Laura smiled bashfully as her cheeks turned red. She turned back to her files. Maybe it was the nervousness and apprehension for the upcoming days, or maybe it was just the fact that she hadn't slept in roughly a day, but in trying to finish perusing the information for the umpteenth time, Laura found herself stopped dead and unable to rip her eyes away from the portrait of the mysterious German agent. Finally, she tore her eyes away, huffed, and shut the file. It closed with a sharp snap of paper, louder that Laura had intended. 

“What's wrong?” Laura’s companion asked absentmindedly, still not moving her eyes away from the pages of her book, “Hey I'm getting kinda hungry. What about you? Do you think they have a McDonald’s in the airport. I could really go for a McMuffin. Or three.” Danny finished her thought and allowed her head to loll in the direction of Laura, only to be slightly alarmed when she found the other girl intensely staring at her. Laura’s eyes only widened more when their eyes met and her mouth set into a harder line. 

Before Danny could ask again what was wrong, “I'm not hungry right now,” spat out of Laura’s mouth, “I'm not hungry, but I do want to talk to you.” Danny could only respond with a slight nod of her head, startled by the short girl’s sudden intensity. Laura shut her eyes and drew in a breath, releasing it shakily from her nose. When she once again opened her eyes, they were no less wild than before. 

“I need to talk to you about something. You can be mad at me for doing this here and now but I need to get this out,” she took another strengthening breath, “I like you. Within a romantic context. That's all.” Laura’s mouth snapped shut, and she abruptly turned to face forward, her back ramrod straight and her whole body very tense. Danny could see that her knuckles were turning white. 

The redhead pushed her glasses further up her nose and closed the pages on Doctor Faustus. Then, she leaned over the armrest of the chair and got her mouth as close to Laura’s ear as possible. Up close, Danny could see Laura only tense up more and it seemed like the shorter woman had stopped breathing altogether. 

“I feel the same way,” she whispered, then quickly drew back into her seat to avoid getting hit by Laura’s head whipping back around. Danny laughed at the incredulous look on the other woman’s face. 

“Do NOT laugh at me right now,” Laura rushed out. Danny only laughed harder, trying and failing to hide it behind her hand. 

“Danny! Please!” 

“Alright, I'm sorry,” the other woman responded, out of breath. Danny smiled lazily at Laura and the other girl was immediately dazzled. 

“You should know that I am a little…upset…or maybe frustrated is a better word, about you doing this here and now,” a look of panic crossed Laura’s face and Danny tried desperately to restrain her laughter before continuing, “you couldn't have waited just like another day to do this, when we’re in our hotel room? God Laura we’re in public so I can't kiss you like I want to.” At that, Laura collapsed in her seat and smacked her head into the collected papers in her lap. Danny heard her mumble something through her hands, 

“What was that, babe?,” Laura shivered in response, “I couldn't hear you.” Danny just continued to smirk. The redhead then gently grabbed Laura’s chin and pried her head out of her lap. She noticed then just how tired Laura looked. Her hair was a mess and her face was slightly haggard. Laura’s brown eyes had sprouted deep black lines underneath and she simply had the aura of someone completely exhausted. Laura resigned herself to the situation and looked right into Danny’s eyes, shamelessly repeating herself. 

“I asked you if you wanted to go make out in the bathroom.” 

A beat of silence followed. The two women just stared at each other, Danny in shock, while Laura’s eyes were almost glassy and far away. Then Danny covered her mouth with her hands and just cackled nearly to the point of hyperventilating. Laura again crumbled in her seat. 

A good minute later Danny composed herself and wiped the tears from her eyes, “Oh my god I really needed that,” she started, but paused to lightly giggle some more. Her face was starting to hurt from how much she was smiling, “I would love to but no. I don't want our first kiss to be in an airport bathroom. Also I'm still hungry. Come on let's eat.” 

The redhead stood up and took Laura’s hand to stand her up as well. A prolonged no groaned from the direction of the shorter girl, but she nonetheless stood herself up, albeit a little shakily. 

“Come on, let's go get some coffee into you.”

 

“Flight F69 to Berlin Schönefeld will now begin boarding at gate 6.”

The two women had been lounging for about half an hour when the speaker system announced their flight. Laura had called down considerably once she had eaten. Danny was still eating, four hash browns in with two more to go. They were back at their seats in the hangar just talking about anything. If Danny read her pages from the phone book, Laura would listen with rapt attention. The way Danny spoke on any subject was charming and intelligent, earning her the reputation as being the life of the party. Right now Danny recounted a tale from her time abroad in Hamburg during college, her hand resting atop Laura’s on the armrest between their two seats. According to her, the first time she had ever tried Jagermeister, she blacked out, and woke up the next morning on a bench outside the Hamburg opera wearing only an oversized Rolling Stones t-shirt, booty shorts, and a press-pass. When Danny sat up, she stepped on a stack of paper, and discovered a 13 page in depth review of a performance of Aida, apparently written by her. Laura laughed mirthfully and Danny squeezed her hand, smiling back at the shorter girl. 

“Flight F69 to Berlin Schönefeld will now gain boarding group 2 at gate 6.” 

“That's us let’s go.” 

 

Laura and Danny had quickly boarded the plane and gotten settled into their seats. Even though Laura had a middle seat, the plane was not completely full, and there was luckily no one sitting in the aisle seat. Laura spitefully thought of Linda working the check in desk and vowed to inform the evil woman of her good luck should she see her again when they returned. Next to her, Danny gazed out the window, her hand again entwined with Laura’s. 

“Welcome passengers to flight F69 to Berlin. This is your captain speaking. Current local time is 5AM. We’re looking at around a ten hour flight and expect to arrive at our destination at around 9PM Berlin time. However, there have been reports of storms in the Berlin area, so it’s possible we may be delayed. Please fasten your seatbelt as we will be taking off shortly.”

“That's kind of later than I was expecting.”

Danny’s voice rocked Laura out of her day dreams.

“I was kind of hoping we’d have a little time to explore the city before we get to work, but I suppose we’ll have plenty of time for that later,” Danny continued, yawning. She turned to Laura, “I think I'm going to try to get some sleep now. You should too. I can tell how tired you are, no offense.” Laura grimaced a little but nodded in response. What she wasn't expecting was for Danny to slouch in her seat and lay her head on Laura’s shoulder. She tensed at the contact and could hear she other woman giggle again. 

“Relax, Laura. Your shoulder isn't comfortable if you're all strung out like that. Like I said. Try and get some sleep.” Laura took a deep breath and unclenched her muscles. The submission made her realize again how truly exhausted the last week, much less the last day had made her. She laid her head on top of Danny’s and before they knew it, the two women were asleep before the plane even took off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On god I swear next chapter I'll introduce more characters. 
> 
> Chapter title from The Talking Heads' "Burning Down the House".


	3. Gather Your Wits and Hold on Fast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a longer one. I love getting feedback so don't be shy.

It just so happened that the pilot was right and Laura and Danny’s flight didn't land until nearly 11 at night. For the last hour, they circled Berlin and Laura was practically on top of the other woman, glued to the window. From so high up, it was even more obvious how the wall cut like a knife through the city. From Brandenburg Gate to the Victory Tower, Laura was enamored with the cursed landscape. 

Finally touching down at Schönefeld, the two of them couldn't get out of the plane and through the airport faster. They wandered almost aimlessly around the airport. Seeing how late at night it was, the crowds were minimal, and yet, Danny couldn't find Perry and Lafontaine. Laura, not knowing the city nor the people they were set to meet, was no help whatsoever. 

“Danny are you sure you know where you're going?” 

“Laura I already told you I really don't,” the taller of the two snapped, “the only time I've ever been to Berlin was on a weekend excursion during my time in Hamburg, which we drove to so no. I have never claimed to know where we are going.”

Laura was slightly taken aback by this, “Alright jeez I'm sorry…,” she muttered to herself. The sound, however, did not escape Danny, who abruptly stopped in her tracks and turned to face Laura, who was still struggling to catch up to Danny’s long strides. 

Laura was slightly out of breath, and the fact that Danny decided to gently cup her cheek in the middle of the airport hangar didn't help manners. Softly, and with the most sincere look in her eyes, Danny whispered, “I'm sorry for snapping at you. I know you're still early nervous about this assignment going smoothly and all, and right now I'm just making you feel worse.” At that, Laura blushed and tried to hide her face in Danny’s hand, experimentally running her lips across the palm before turning back to the other girl and making direct eye contact. 

The tension was palpable and tasted like the night. Laura was sure if something didn't break them apart now, it would suddenly be along time before anything could. The thickness of the late May heat only made Laura feel like she was spinning even more out of control. And then, before she completely let herself go, a chorus of “Oi!” and “Hey Lawrence” cut through the fog. Danny pulled her hand away from the shorter girl’s burning cheek and turned towards the commotion. Laura was still stuck in a dream, now staring at the cuff of her almost lover’s sweatshirt. She was never the praying type, but in that moment, she begged the lord to someday find out what exactly was underneath the blue, and soon. 

Then suddenly, Danny was very quickly walking away and Laura noticed the giant grin on her face. Danny was quickly enveloped in a back slapping hug with a short, jolly looking red head. The newcomer was talking very loud and Laura could pick up on something of a posh accent. Probably a Londoner, she surmised. Danny was guiding the newcomer over to where Laura stood, and this was when the brunette noticed their other companion. Another red head, but with a very different aura than that of her partner. Whereas Danny’s friend sported a highly coiffed pompadour and casual dress appropriate for the time of day, the other woman’s hair was pulled up into a tight bun and the patterned button down and brown dress pants gave an air of professionalism, something Laura assumed she tried very hard to maintain. The most intense looking of all of the assembled party, her oxfords clicked on the cement flooring as the three approached Laura. The two other women were dwarfed by Danny’s height, but then again, who wasn't.

Laura held her hand out to the Londoner and opened her mouth to introduce herself, when she found herself in a back cracking hug. 

“You must be Laura. It's so good to finally meet you. You've caught a fine one Lawrence,” they shouted, winking over their shoulder at Danny, who blushed and looked down at her feet. “The name’s Lafontaine, but please call me Laf. I hate formalities. God knows how I get along with Miss. Perry over here,” they continued, releasing Laura from the vice grip. 

Laura turned to the other newcomer. Already holding her hand out to shake, the brunette took the offered hand and was surprised to notice that this woman was wearing riding gloves. The surprises did not end. 

“Hello. How are you? My name is Agent Lola Perry, but do call me Perry,” the redhead said, reserved and with somewhat of a curt smile. Lola Perry’s thick Scottish accent caught the other woman completely off guard. 

“It's nice to meet you too. Both of you really,” Laura stuttered, staring dumbfoundedly at Perry.

Danny, finally interjecting back into the conversation, “I'm sure you guys have been waiting so long, especially due to the delay. We should get going.”

“Agreed,” said Laf, once again slapping Danny on the back, who winced a little at the force, “car’s outside. Let's get a move on.” They strode off, Laura suddenly finding it difficult to keep up with all three of them, despite the fact that Perry and Laf were at about her height. 

They chatted as they walked, and soon, the chatter turned to the mission at hand. “So you two have read the dossier, right?” Danny inquired. A “yep” and “of course” sounded from Laf and Perry, respectively. “Fantastic,” the tall woman continued, “Laura and I have a couple questions but really one of them I'm pertinent. I was hoping you could clear it up for us.” Laf gestured to go ahead. 

“Who is Matska Belmonde?”

In spite of her composure, Perry’s step stuttered slightly and her face burned a color near to that of her hair. She did everything possible to avoid eye contact with Lafontaine, who besides suddenly drilling holes into the side of Perry’s head, their bubble smile had turned more wicked and conniving. 

“Oh yes we know Matska very well don't we Lola?” Laf continued to tease, “What would you call her? Your petite amie? Maybe your wee Mary-Anne?” 

Perry sped up in an attempt to escape, “I suppose the second option would be apt,” she grumbled, still loud enough for the rest of the party to hear. 

Laura noticed that Danny became confused, as was she. However, she guessed that it was for a different reason than Laura. 

“Perry wait. I thought you were going out with that girl Mattie? Did something happen between you two,” Danny asked. For some reason, the question only seemed to amuse Lafontaine even more. 

“No Danny you haven't got anything wrong Mattie is-”

“Lafontaine stop. I will explain.” Perry came to an abrupt halt in front of them and turned to face the rest of the group. “Danny, Laura. Mattie is a nickname for Matska. Yes, I am romantically involved with one of the agents we're rendezvousing with during this assignment. I do not believe that this relationship should affect are work in any way and neither should you, considering the one we’re really dealing with is Carmilla.” Both Laf and Perry only rolled their eyes at the mention of the mysterious Countess. Something in Perry’s eyes shifted to a look of apprehension. 

“Oh,” sounded off both Laura and Danny. Danny looked more confused than anything else. Laura, on the other hand, got the feeling that there was more to this than they were divulging, specifically I respect to Carmilla. It seemed like Perry could see the gears turning in the brunette’s head, so she quickly whipped around and briskly picked up her pace in an effort to avoid more questioning. 

“Now wait a minute,” Laura started, “what exactly is the deal with Carmilla?”.

“Well she's a mythic bitch who’s hard to work with,” Lafontaine stated plainly.

“No its more than that.” 

“Lafontaine is right about Carmilla’s…mannerisms,” Perry explained, shooting a pointed look at Laf, “but you're right…”

“Well spit it out then please.” Laura was growing impatient. 

Perry drew in a breath and said through gritted teeth, “Carmilla also happens to be Mattie, or Matska’s, sister.”

“Half-sister,” chimed Laf, “same mum.” 

Laura placed a hand over her mouth and screamed into it. This assignment just kept getting more complicated with every passing minute. At the same time, Danny, with eyebrows furrowed, entered back into the conversation, “So let me get this straight. You are dating Matska Belonde, a German spy, who is one of the ones we’re rendezvousing with. Additionally, the other spy happens to be the half-sister of the other, not to mention a well documented pain in the ass? How was this allowed? Why are we even dealing with Carmilla in the first place if she's known for not playing well with others?” Danny’s face continued to grow redder and redder. 

Laura joined in on the inquisition, while the MI6 agents only continued to become increasingly uncomfortable, “Yeah why ARE we meeting with Carmilla? Aren't there literally any other agents we could be working with besides your girlfriend and her sister?” Laura’s voice began to get shrill, “you guys this is my first field assignment! Right now I feel like I'm basically doomed to fail!”

By this point, the group finally reached the exit to the airport. Laura and Danny continued to berate the British. Lafontaine thankfully looked sheepish, whereas Perry became increasingly angry with each question. Having enough, you yanked Laura to her and grabbed Danny by the collar so that they would be at equal height. “You two listen here,” she hissed, her accent becoming more pronounced, “what I am going to tell you now is the difference between your knowledge, and what Laf and I know. Once I am finished, you and I will be on equal ground and any more questions you may unfortunately have I cannot answer and would be better served for Matska or Carmilla. Understood?” The Americans nodded, intimidated, “Good. I want us to be able to work well together and considering I already know Danny, I trust that,” she began speaking directly to Laura, “you and I will also get along, but right now you aren't making a very good first impression.” Again Laura nodded. 

“Good. So here's what we know. The reason we are dealing with Carmilla is because she personally was the one who gathered the information and thus, is the one who has it. We do not know what the information is, however, we know that Carmilla was alerted to its existence via a handwritten letter, sent to her person address mind you, explaining the situation. The information she has collected is in the form of typed documents and recordings on cassette tape, which Carmilla has also transcribed herself. Now the reason Mattie is there…is really to play mediator.”

“Now wait a minute,” Laura had the audacity to interrupt, turning Perry redder, “I thought Danny and I were supposed to be the mediators between British and German intelligence.”

The Scottish woman grimaced a little at this, “First of all, Laura, to suggest that United States intelligence would ever do anything just as a peacekeeping measure is ridiculous. You are here because your government wants any information it can get its hands on, whether or not it's relevant to them at all or not, which I can only assume these documents are not. That being said, I have a feeling that this situation is going to get out of control fast so the more people we have on it the better.” 

Unpleased with the accusations as to the nature of her work, Laura choose to nonetheless not interrupt again. Perry continued, “Second of all. Simply put, Carmilla won't listen to either of you. Carmilla doesn't know you two, not that she listens to anyone anyway. However, she trusts Mattie, so Mattie’s role in this is one of…a guiding force. Not that that's all she's good for of course. She’s intelligent, resourceful, charming, beautiful, a wonderful lover…” She was beginning to grow starry eyed, and sensing Laura and Danny’s growing discomfort, cut herself off, “But of course I'm getting ahead of myself. It's time for us to leave. We have an early morning tomorrow. The car is right outside.” The brit finally released her hold on Laura, as well as Danny’s collar and she and Laf led the other two outside. 

They stepped outside. It was a cool night and a light drizzle had begun to fall. A plane began take off. Perry walked away from the rest of the group. 

“Where is she going?” Laura asked Laf, yelling over the sound of the jet.

“It's been arranged for us all to stay at The Black Cat in Mitte while we’re here, in rooms right next to each other. Only the three of us are going to be there tonight. Perry’s going to escort us to the hotel and then leave to meet Mattie. Lola and I haven't been in Berlin in some time and Mattie hasn't been able to visit London recently she it's been awhile since they've seen each other in person. They're meeting us back at The Cat in the morning so you two will also get to meet Matska Belmonde then,” Laf explained, also yelling over the sound of take off. 

Just then, the sound of a motorcycle starting drew Laura’s attention. Looking over to the source of the noise, her eyes widened to see Perry pulling on a helmet while mounted on a bike. The riding gloves finally made sense, but Lola Perry herself would still continue to surprise. 

Laf took in the brunette’s surprise and chuckled, “Yep that's Perry for you. Come on she's waiting for us to get in the car.” Lafontaine led the two Americans over to a silver van parked behind Perry’s bike. It looked brand new and had no license plates, something Laura hoped wouldn't cause even more trouble. She also noticed that the windows were thick and heavily tinted, Laura prayed that they were bulletproof. Laf got into the driver’s seat while the other two women took to the back. The seats were leather and the interior smelled as new as the exterior looked. Outside, Perry revved her engine again, and took off, the van quickly following. The brunette made a mental note to later inquire about the kind of bike Perry drove. Her dad would want to know. 

The drive to the inner twisting of Berlin took about 40 minutes. Winding through the medieval streets, the contrast between old stone structures and new glass skyscrapers was even more obvious. The wall itself drove a curiosity in Laura, and she hoped that someday soon she would get to Lauren what lay beyond it. Soon the bike and the car were approaching the city center. Then Perry suddenly swerved off the main road and into a more residential neighborhood. Nearly missing the same turn, Laf cursed Perry and the night and remarked how it was difficult to navigate the city after hours.

The street, which Laura has failed to notice the name of, was densely populated with more traditional looking houses, in contrast to the sparse presence of any street lights. The adrenaline and excitement of being in such a new place was beginning to wear off on the brunette, and was quickly being replaced with the realization that they were in a completely foreign landscape. Laura was completely out of her element here, not that she was completely certain that she had ever been in her element. Almost subconsciously, she crowded further up to Danny. The taller woman smoothed back her companion’s hair and lazily placed her arm around her shoulders. Laura caught Laf looking at them in the rear view, and upon realizing they had been caught, the driver quickly refocused their attention on the road. 

Laura tried to find something else to distract her. She assumed that they were approaching their destination, but ever the diligent student, never missed an opportunity to learn. Laura had purchased German language learning tapes for her walkman and listened to them for the duration of the flight, despite being asleep for most of it. She once again pulled out the tapes, put on her headphones, and began silently mouthing along to the instructions provided for her. She also failed to notice that once again, she was getting stares from others within the van. One was a look of confusion, the other a gaze of pure endearment and amusement. 

The ride did not last much longer and the steady rumble of both the road and Perry’s bike came to a slow halt. Laura was brought out of her German induced trance by a tap on her shoulder from Danny, indicating to her that they had arrived. Laf turned around in the front seat and addressed the two women, “You guys just wait in the car for a minute. I have to talk to Perry about something. I'll be back in a minute.” Laf exited the car and walked over to where Perry was still perched on the motorcycle. Laura could tell from here that she was anxious to get back on the road. The brunette couldn't tell what the two were talking about, but whatever it was, Laf was uncomfortable and Perry only continued to get more annoyed, beginning to wave her hands around wildly. Laf shrugged their shoulders as if to say “well don't blame me for it”. In response, Perry just stared at her friend for a long moment, and then, without warning, kicked up the engine again and sped off into the night. Laf had to lean back to avoid the spray of dirt. Soon, the bike’s rumble receded and Perry disappeared into the night. 

Laf once again sighed heavily, then walked back over to the van. They opened the car door and motioned for Laura and Danny to exit. 

“It feels good to finally walk around again,” Danny remarked, stretching. Laura caught a glimpse of the taller woman’s midriff as Danny reached as high as she could. Feeling her cheeks heating up, Laura quickly looked away, scandalized and kind of turned on. She further distracted herself by opening the trunk to retrieve their remaining luggage. 

Laura finally turned around and examined the place where they would be staying, and was taken aback by what she saw. Evidently, The Black Cat seemed to be a converted Victorian style manor house. It wouldn't normally be the kind of place Laura would choose to stay, but she was entranced nonetheless. Among all the more traditional German style housing, this place seemed even more out of place than normal. The dark brown brick exterior was weathered with sides of it completely covered by ivy. The black roofing and trim was made even darker by the cover of night. Laura counted about four of five stories and prayed that at some point an elevator had been added to the building. The entire structure was surrounded by immaculately kept grounds that must have gone on for acres. These grounds were then surrounded by heavy wrought iron fencing. As if tied off with a bow, a widow’s walk sat at the very top of the house. A pale blue neon sign overtop the ornate front door read “The Black Cat” on top of a cat with its shoulders raised, as if ready to strike. Interestingly enough, another neon sign below read “No Vacancies”. Laura found this strange, seeing as there seemed to be no other cars around, and the only light on in the manor seemed to be the one right beyond the front door, presumably the lobby and office. After a moment of thought, she shrugged this off on account of the late hour. 

Grinning, Laura turned to Danny and Laf, the former of which was just as entranced by the house as she. The trio lugged their baggage inside and once again, Laura was struck by the intensity of the decor. While the outside was strictly Victorian, evidence of centuries could be found within. The floors were a deep dark hardwood and covered with beautifully patterned emerald green rugs. The walls were adorned with burgundy and gold wallpaper with a pattern matching the carpet. The ornate staircase winded up through the halls and the rankling was decorated with a distinctly Art Deco design. Chairs, tables, sofas, and all other kinds of furniture littered the lounges on the ground floor, each seeming to be from a different time period ranging from all the way back to gothic times all the way to the modern day. 

“I see you're admiring our manor, Ms. Stewart. I would love to tell you more about it,” Laura was suddenly shaken from her awe by a voice coming from behind her. She hadn't realized it, but she had wandered into one of the lounges to further admire the decor. What struck her most was State of the art TV that sat opposite a mid century modern loveseat. The voice had a slight German accent, but not to the point that he was difficult to understand. She whirled around and behind the large solid wood front desk sat an elderly man wearing a monogrammed smoking jacket and matching smoking cap. The ensemble was the same color and print as the walls and the breast of the jacket had the initials CV emblazoned on them. The man wore a plain white button up beneath the jacket. Behind him, a rack with twenty ornate room keys sat. Only a couple were missing, despite what the sign said outside. On top of the large desk sat a bell, a ledger, a telephone, and maps and guides to the surrounding area. Danny was browsing through one such guide. 

Coming out of her stupor, “Oh I'm sorry I didn't realize you were talking to me. I'm not Ms. Stewart,” Laura stammered, stepping out of the lounge and back into the foyer with the rest of the party. 

The man was unfazed. “I'm sorry. Are you not the Stewart party?” he asked.

This was when Laf cut back in. “Yes. We are the Stewart party,” they replied, sending an annoyed glance Laura’s way. The brunette didn't even realize she had done anything wrong. Laf continued, “Look, I know we’re later than predicted,” they gestured in the direction of Laura and Danny, “but their plane got delayed and we’re here now. We should had two adjacent rooms.”

This unfazed but on his guard, the man replied, “I thought this was supposed to be a party of four…”.

Laf sighed and said, “Yes. Regretfully our fourth member will not be able to join us tonight but she and her companion will be meeting us here tomorrow morning. A Ms. Mary Stewart and her companion will be joining us in the morning. After that, you can expect all four occupants to be accounted for.”

“A Ms. Stewart’s companion? Will they be staying.”

“No, at least not overnight. If a Ms. Marlene Dietrich asks for anyone in the Stewart Party, she's authorized to be sent to us.”

“And do remind me,” the older man continued, “who exactly are all these people in the Stewart Party?”

Again Laf signed. This was another check in process that wasn't going as smoothly as one would have hoped. Although was confused, she quickly caught on to the usage of fake names and figured that it was best to sort all of this out now rather than get their wires crossed in the future. Thinking of the future, she also realized that she didn't know how long this mission was supposed to last. Laura decided she would bring it up to Danny once they settled into their rooms. 

Laf continued, “while as I said there's a Ms. Mary Stewart,” they put out their hand to be shaken. The man took it, “I am A. Lister.” Laf gestured to Danny, “Ms. Sean Young,” then to Laura, “and Ms. Barbara Stanwyck.” Laura was pleasantly surprised at the pseudonym chosen for her. 

Satisfied, the man at the desk took two keys from the rack, rooms 24 and 25, “your rooms are in the attic. They are the only two up there, as requested. I assure you it is very nice up there, doesn't feel like an attic at all,” he turned back to Laura, “I suppose now would be a good time for me to tell you about the history of this manor.”

“Oh no that's ok we’re pretty tired and I'm sure you are too-”

“Nonsense,” Laura was powerless to stop him, “this manor was built here by a visiting English diplomat in 1840. After he died around 1887, none of his heirs wanted it so the grounds were sold to my great-grandfather, who renovated it into the hotel you see today. Now to get into the nitty gritty-”

“Sir, there's one more matter we must discuss with you,” Laf curtly cut off. He motioned for them to continue. “You know The Countess, I presume?” At this, the man paled slightly and straightened his back. “Good. Well if the countess comes calling, you do as she says alright.” 

“Of course. I wouldn't dream of displeasing the countess in any way.”

With that, Laf snatched Danny, who was still completely engrossed in the guide book, snatched Laura, and snatched their luggage. There was, unfortunately, no elevator, and the slog up through the second, third and fourth floors was brutal. The trio eventually reached the landing to the attic, which had been nicely renovated, as the man at the desk said. The two rooms were across a narrow hall from each other. At the end of the hall sat a leather recliner and a bookcase against the wall. Laf handed Danny the key to room 25, and with a mumbled “good night”, trudged off to their room as Danny and Laura did the same. 

Danny opened the door to their room and Laura followed her inside. The two women chucked their luggage on their ground, and the door had barely closed when suddenly Laura was against it and Danny was everywhere. Danny’s hands found their way into the brunette’s already messy hair and the kiss between the two of them was searing. There was little to no space between then so Laura could feel everything: from the softness of Danny’s lips to the feeling of her cheeks in Laura’s face to how Danny probably didn't even realize she was grinding the other girl. All Laura wanted to do was feel. The taller of the two still tasted slightly of the fish meal they had been given on the plane, and yet, Laura continued to move her mouth against her companion as if it didn't even matter. It didn't. Finally breaking apart, the air between them was still as both women were too afraid to breathe and break the small sanctuary they had made for themselves. Laura finally opened her eyes and was met with Danny’s still closed. She chased after the redheads lips, but sensing Laura’s movement, Danny pressed her forehead against the other woman’s to stop her. Laura’s hands desperately gripped Danny’s taught forearms. She still hadn't gotten the chance to change out of the Yale sweatshirt she was wearing when they got to the airport back in Baltimore. 

Danny finally opened her eyes and Laura caught her gaze, searching for some kind of recognition. “I'm sorry. I should have asked,” the redhead finally breathed out. Laura fell the air of Danny’s word brush her nose. She almost couldn't believe this. Was Danny way more clueless than she originally thought of just that chivalrous? Either way, it made Laura a little frustrated. She wished Danny could just automatically intuit what she wanted, but supposed it was also too early in their relationship for that. The brunette led her head knock against the door and blew out a strangled breath. She then brought her face back up to Danny’s ear.

“Catch me.”

“What?” 

And without any further warning, Laura jumped and wrapped her legs around Danny’s waist. Always reliable, Danny managed to get her hands under Laura’s butt before the two of them fell to the floor. For a moment, Laura relished what it was like to be the taller of the two before bringing her mouth back down to Danny’s. “Bed” she managed to mumble between lips, so Danny managed to walk them backwards, almost dropping Laura onto the bed. There were two twin beds in the suite, but Laura predicted that the other one wouldn't get much use. She focused back on the task at hand. Danny had quickly climbed on top of her and the two women began to kiss again with unwavering passion and fervor despite their exhaustion. However, said exhaustion could not be ignored for much longer. When Danny slipped a hand underneath Laura’s t-shirt, it almost physically pained the other woman to grab her hand to stop. Laura knew if she didn't stop her now, she wouldn't be able to find it within herself to stop at all. 

Danny opened her mouth, most likely to apologize, but before she could, “Don't apologize. Please. I honestly really want to have sex with you but I also really want to sleep. It's like,” Laura glanced at the clock on the bedside table, “one in the morning and I suspect that Perry and Mattie won't be here any later than nine.” Danny, like the other girl, looked disappointed at this. Laura pecked her lips and tangled her hands in the red locks, “I promise you,” she pecked Danny again, the other woman smiling bashfully, “I promise you that the next night we are in this room, we are going to fuck to high heaven and back and it's going to be great.” Danny looked as shocked as Laura felt at her words, and leaned back in for a long languid kiss. They pulled away, breathless again.

“With that, I'm going to change in the bathroom. Don't want you getting any ideas,” Danny chuckled. She kissed Laura one more time before climbing off the bed and rooting through her suitcase for some pajamas, leaving Laura grinning like a fool on top of the sheets. As soon as the door to the bathroom clicked shut, Laura allowed he exhaustion to wash over her. It was the first in what would inevitably be a long string of long days. The incredibly soft bed drawing her in, Laura had only the strength to kick off her shoes before crawling under the covers. She would more thoroughly examine her surroundings tomorrow morning, but as she drifted off, the brunette noticed how cool it was in the room, and felt blessed that The Black Cat had been renovated with air conditioning. It was hot for May, and the summer could only get hotter. Laura allowed herself to finally be taken by sleep, a weight slipping underneath the covers on the other side of the bed being the last thing she felt before succumbing to the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from Tina Turner's "The Acid Queen".
> 
> Basically everyone in this story besides Danny and Laura has some kind of foreign accent due to the setting of the story, and I know sometimes authors like to write out phonetically what it would sound like. I'm not going to do that a. Because I just don't really want to and b. Because I think that sometimes it can distract from a story rather than add anything and since most of the characters have some kind of accent, I think it would also get really confusing. So just know that whenever Perry speaks, she has a thick Scottish accent and the same principle applies to the others.
> 
> If probably going to try and throw in some Scottish/British/German slang though so that'll be fun to research. 
> 
> Again, I love feedback, and I'll try to update this story ASAP


	4. You May Not Like the Things We Say (What's the Difference Anyway?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our hero enters
> 
>  
> 
> I'm back baby. Thanks for all the comments and kudos. I love hearing from you all.

In a perfect world, Laura would have been awoken by the lyrical chirping of birds or the soft rumble of a train passing outside. However, since this was Berlin, Laura and Danny were awoken by pounding on the door at, Laura peeled open her eyes to glance at the clock on the bedside table, 6:30 in the morning. Groaning, the brunette attempted to burrow back under the covers and fall back asleep. This was made difficult by the squirming of her bedmate. Danny, whom Laura had learned was a very…active sleeper, was struggling to free herself from the sheets and get out of bed. Laura was once again kicked in the shin. 

“Sorry,” Danny grumbled, voice still thick from sleep. Laura watched her go to the door where someone, presumably Lafontaine, was still hammering away. The redhead yanked open the door and was immediately punched in the face by the person on the other side, who was in fact, Laf, who was going in for another round of knocks when the door had opened. Danny groaned and sank to the floor, clutching her nose. Laf shoved past her, a frantic look on their face.

“Oh jeez,” Laura muttered. 

“You guys I've been trying to get you up for half an hour. Perry and Mattie are getting here at 7.” Danny continued to kneel on the floor, too tired and in pain to get up.

Still groggy, Laura responded, “Why are they getting here so early? I thought we weren't meeting up with Carmilla until like, 11?. She began to make her way out of bed and towards Danny. In contrast to the beautiful hardwood floors of the lobby and first floor, the light pink shag carpeting was soft and supple under Laura’s bare feet and she finally took the time to take in her surroundings. As she noted last night, there were two twin beds in the room, not that the other was going to be used. The wallpaper matched the pattern of the walls downstairs, but here in was in two different shades of yellow. The room was sparsely furnished, but not completely barren. The bed frames were wood and very ornate. In the center of the room was a small tv with a desk and chair of to the right, situated in the corner. To Laura’s surprise, a phone, a two way radio receiver and headset, and what looked like a police scanner were already set up on top of the desk. The blinds over the window were a deep black to block out the rising sun, suspending the room in an unknown time of day. 

Laura helped Danny, still clutching her nose, off the floor and ushered her into the bathroom, “Laf just give us a minute, keep talking though, I can still hear you.” The walls were a sleek, black subway tile, which contrasted dramatically with the rest of the fixtures, which were mostly plain, white porcelain. Laura sat the other woman on the toilet to examine the wound. A little bruised, but Danny would be fine. Laura leaned down to give her a peck on the lips, which made Danny smile and lean up for another.

“Well good morning to you too,” the tall woman drawled, still chasing after Laura’s lips with her own. 

“As I was saying,” came from the other room, “Mattie and Perry are going to be here in,” Laf paused, presumably to check their watch, “28 minutes. We do not want to keep them waiting especially Ms. Belmonde.”

“But again I ask,” started Laura. She put a finger against Danny’s lips and turned towards the sink to start her morning routine, “why are they getting here so early?”

Laura wasn't sure, but she thought she might have heard Lafontaine tapping their foot, “Well basically Mattie is taking us, more specifically you because she already knows me, out to breakfast as a welcome and to make a good first impression. Then she's going to formally list of a number of warnings about Carmilla.”

“Well there's nothing wrong with a free breakfast,” Laura said around a toothbrush, “but is all this going to take 4 hours?” 

“Well no. Breakfast is probably going to take 3 hours and then you have to generously account for traffic so it'll probably take us about an hour to get to Carmilla’s apartment.” At this Laura nearly choked on her floss. 

Danny entered back into the situation, “Excuse me, but why are we going to Carmilla’s apartment?” 

“And how many times are we going to hear about how much of a bitch Carmilla is? Like, I think I get it. She's a pain in the ass,” Laura chimed in, dragging Danny with her out of the bathroom. 

Lafontaine at the desk. They caught Laura’s eye and subtlety gestured to the bed that had gone unused the night before. Danny failed to notice when Laura turned beet red. Clearing their throat, Lafontaine answered, “Honestly Laura you won't actually understand the “majesty” of Carmilla until you behold it. Mattie is the best one to prep you for it though, among other things. As for your question, Danielle,” Danny shot a warning glare their way, “Carmilla’s the one with the info, she makes the rules. And another thing that you Danny are you going to like.” 

“Do tell,” Danny shot back, looking increasingly annoyed. Without warning, the tall woman whipped off her t-shirt to reveal a toned stomach. Whereas Laf turned in embarrassments, Laura couldn't help but admire the way Danny’s obliques ran up and down her torso and flexed as the redhead rifled around her suitcase for something to wear. Laura finally managed to tear her eyes away from the purely erotic scene before and began to dress herself. Shiny removing the clothes she wore yesterday, the brunette wondered if Danny would admire her body the way Laura did her, while also secretly hoping for just that. 

“Are you two decent yet,” came Laf’s annoyed voice.

“No.”

“Well I'll just tell you anyway,” Laf said, nervous to continue.

“Lafontaine you do know you still haven't told us anything right?” Danny pressed.

“Carmilla is technically a higher ranking agent than you.” 

“WHAT?! HOW,” came a chorus from the other two occupants of the room.

“SHE’S A YEAR YOUNGER THAN ME. SHE’S ONLY 25.”

“And you're only 26. Carmilla has been a German agent since she was 18. The government paid for her college as long as she agreed to spy for them. Of course there were other factors at play but…”

“But what.”

“But that's not really my place to say,” Lafontaine finally finished, “you guys I'm going to go downstairs to wait for Mattie and Perry. You need to be down there in 15 minutes.” Laf could not get out of the room faster. Once the door slammed behind them, Danny attempted to burn a hole through it with her eyes. Laura realized she never even got the chance to ask them about the radio on the desk.

“Danny we’re really out of our element here,” Laura whispered, completely spooked. She had finished dressing, picking out a simple light blue button down and some navy slacks, her hair pulled back into a casual, but not messy, ponytail. Turning towards her companion, she saw that Danny was still tense and seething, hands frozen about to button the top button on her blouse. She approached the woman and took the redhead’s hands in her own. This seemed to snap Danny out of her trance. 

“Baby it's not Laf’s fault. Besides, in my mind, you're always going to be the most valuable agent.”

At that, Danny sighed and brought Laura into a hug, resting her forehead on top of brown locks. Laura soaked in the feeling of her cheek resting on Danny’s base chest, and hoped that it would be one she could feel again very soon. 

After a moment of silence, “Yeah you're right,” Danny kissed the top of her lover’s head before pulling away and continuing to dress. 

 

At 7:01 the two women touched down on the floor of the lobby and found their party in the lounge. There they found Lafontaine, Perry, and the most elegant looking woman Laura had ever seen. She sat next to Perry on a powder blue loveseat, her arm draped across the back. Her sleek black hair feel thick and straight down to her shoulders, drawing attention to the locket around her neck, resting gently on the woman’s dark skin. Laura dreamed of owning something that looked even a fraction as expensive as the black and white dress this woman was wearing, and from across the room, Laura could tell by the way that her legs were crossed that the bottom of her heels were red. The three of them were laughing about something Laf said when Perry rested her hand on her companion’s chest and leaned in close to whisper something in the mysterious newcomer’s ear, which only made the woman laugh harder. Despite the fact that they had only met once before, Laura could tell that it was times like these where Perry felt the most relaxed. She had ditched the riding gloves and as she and Danny grew closer to the group, Laura noticed what looked to be an engagement ring on Perry’s left hand. 

Laura made eye contact with Perry, who got up from the couch, prompting the other two to do the same. 

Perry grinned nervously and was about to introduce the newcomer. The newcomer, however, beat her to it, “Matska Belmonde,” she held out her hand to Danny, then Laura, “it's so nice to finally be introduced.” The strength and power in just Mattie’s handshake was not lost on Laura. Her voice was silky and held an accent that was distinct to her personality, but difficult to place on a map. Her deep brown eyes made arresting eye contact with the two women and Laura could tell they were friendly, if not slightly guarded. 

“I’m Danny Lawrence, and this is Laura Hollis. Perry has already told us so much about you, all good I assure you, that I can't believe we're just meeting for the first time.” Danny was really turning on the charm. 

“Yeah Perry’s gushing about you all the time,” chimed in Laf, poking Perry in the side. Perry, in response, slapped the hand away and blushed deeply. 

Matska’s polite smile turned into a huge grin at the mention of the redhead. Her teeth, straight and pearly white, only enhanced her elegance. Glancing behind at the blushing Perry, Mattie asked, “is that true my love?” She reached for the other woman’s hand, which was readily given and pressed the palm to her lips. Perry blushed deeper and let one of her red curls, which were laying down naturally that morning, to be wrapped around her index finger.

“It may be,” she teased, her red painted lips in a coy smile. Laura enjoyed seeing Perry this way. It was interesting to see that even someone as stoic and professional as Perry could be reduced to a schoolgirl with a crush. 

Mattie dropped their hands and threaded her fingers with Perry’s. Laura noticed that she took extra care to run a thumb across the ring delicately placed on her lover’s hand. And what a ring it was. She was no jewelry expert, but the brunette could recognize a Tiffany setting when she saw one.

“Very well, Lola,” Perry almost imperceptibly squeezed her companion’s hand at the use of her given name, “keep your secrets. Shall we?” Mattie led the pack through the lobby and out the front door of the Black Cat, making sure to say goodbye to the man at the desk on the way out. 

Stepping outside, Danny and Laura were immediately blinded by their first contact with the early morning sun. When they regained their vision, in front of them sat a gorgeous navy blue Thunderbird. 

“Mattie is this your car? It's beautiful,” questioned Laura, who again knew her dad would want to know about this.

“Indeed,” she purred, “isn’t he lovely? I call him Scott. It was a gift. Guess who from.” Laura didn't need to guess, but it did remind her of her question from the previous night. 

“Perry, what kind of motorcycle do you drive?” At the mention of the bike, Mattie scoffed and rolled her eyes. A muttered “that damn things a death trap” could be heard out of the side of her mouth. Perry, in response, muttered back something along the lines of “you thought it was so sexy when we first met”, but Laura would pretend she hadn't overheard.

“It's a 1952 Vincent Black Lightning, and I love it very much,” the redhead beamed. She shot a smug look at her girlfriend, who rolled her eyes again. 

Laura, however, was slightly shocked by this answer, “that is…a very rare bike. How did you get one? How long have you had it?

“I've had it for about 5 years. It was a 21st birthday present for myself. I have my ways,” she winked. 

A slender hand suddenly made its way to Laura’s and she tensed up before realizing that it was just Danny, “I didn't realize you were a car person, babe.” What was more startling that Danny suddenly holding her hand, was the other woman’s casual use of “babe”. Laura was under no doubt that she liked the way it sounded. Coming from the lips of Danny, anything sounded like gospel to Laura’s ears. Laura would have just liked to be consulted first. Between the kissing and the exhaustion, the two of them hadn't found the time to discuss the nature of their relationship, although Laura wanted it to be one where they casually called each other “babe”. It was basically a non-issue, but one that meant a lot to the brunette. She was sure they would talk about it later. 

“I'm not really, but my dad is a mechanic so I kind of just absorbed things over the years,” Laura answered absentmindedly. Her mind was still focused on Danny calling her “babe.

“And what does your mom do Laura, I don't think you ever mentioned,” asked Lafontaine. 

This snapped Laura out of her thoughts, “My mother died when I was seven.” Laura knew that dropping that information would instantly kill the jovial mood the group had been in, but it was bound to come up eventually. Still standing on the sidewalk outside the hotel, all five of them stood in heavily awkward silence. 

Perry was the one to break the silence, “I'm very sorry to hear that. Perhaps we should get going? Baby, should I drive, or do you want to?” The keys to the thunderbird were handed over to the redhead and the gang piled into the car. Perry drove, Mattie sat shotgun, while the other three squished together on the backseat. Laura being the smallest, was relegated to the middle. Perry began the journey and a light jazz tune played on the radio. 

A short drive later, and the car pulled up in front of a small café. The neighborhood they were in now seemed more inviting than where they were staying in Mitte. The residential block they were on had a nice abundance of trees. Many people sat on the stoop of their brownstones to take in the early morning sun. The weather that morning was cool, but not unpleasantly cold. The sun was out, and Laura figured that it would probably heat up as the day went on. 

The group piled out of the car, “Where are we?,” asked Laura. 

“We’re in Schöneberg now. I guess more specifically in the Bavarian Quarter,” it was Mattie who answered, “it's more eclectic than downtown. And I guess even more specifically,” the woman grinned and whirled around to face the café, “welcome to Silas’!” Mattie was practically shouting at this point and Perry’s face fell into her palm. Laura shifted her attention from the street to the café. Indeed, a sign hung above the door read “Silas’ Best Bavarian Bakery and Breakfast”. The restaurant was quain, with a small interior and seating outside. Intricate cakes and pastries sat on display in the window. 

“Let’s seat ourselves. Outside is best in this weather.”

Danny and Laf set to work pushing two tables together outside. The sound of metal scraping on concrete was grating and disturbed the quiet tranquility of the morning. Just then a short man angrily stomped his way out of the bakery. A name tag on his apron read “Graz”. 

“Who is making all that noise and scaring away all my customers,” this “Graz” said. Though a small man, he had an imposing presence. Danny and Laf stopped out of fear. He then turned, fuming, to Mattie and Perry, who were still beaming and glowering, respectively, and all of Graz’s anger melted away, “Ah! Matska! Come to eat me out of house and home again? And I see you've brought the wife,” he gestured to Perry, a sour look still on her face, “And some new friends. Perfect! Just make them stop all that racket. I'll send Robin out to take your order’s in a moment.” By the end, the man was practically spitting with excitement, and his salt and pepper beard was beginning to grow slightly damp. With a slight bow, he turned around back into the building, his bald head retreating in search of his wife. Five pairs of eyes stared to watch him go. Only three of them were intimidated by what had just happened. 

“I can't wait to see Robin,” exclaimed Mattie, breaking the silence. That comment finally released Perry from her stupor and she whipped around to elbow her girlfriend in the stomach, “Ow! God, Perry you know I'm not going to say anything to her.” 

“You'd better not,” Perry hissed in response. 

The party took their seats. Momentarily a woman with the name tag “Robin” appeared to take their order and it became obvious why Mattie was so excited. Robin was a sight to behold and in a word, looked artificial. She took their orders and left. Their breakfast appeared in record time. 

“So what are we doing here,” Danny said around a bite of croissant. She was seated next to Laura and under the table, her hand rested on the shorter girl’s knee. Seeing as this was clearly a business meeting more than anything else, the affection made Laura a little uncomfortable. However, she wasn't about to swat the hand away and possible hut Danny’s feelings. Honestly, Laura noticed that ever since Mattie arrived, Danny had gone out of her way to almost, “stake a claim” to Laura. She wondered if the tall redhead felt threatened by the other two women, but realized that Danny was probably jealous of them. They seemed well matched and had a solid relationship, so it made sense for Danny to want what they had. Still, Laura knew that they would have to talk about it later. 

From Laura’s other side, Lafontaine answered Danny’s question, “Well we’re here for a couple reasons. One of them is that Mattie loves this place. Second, is that it's a convenient location. Do you see,” Laf pointed to a house a little ways down the block. The brick was light brown and a deep black door could be seen from their place at the café, “that brownstone? That's Carmilla’s house. Four floors, all to herself. Plus she has stuff on the roof too.” The building itself looked unassuming. Laura could only imagine the horrors it hid within. 

Not taking her eyes off the street, “So Mattie. Laf tells us that you're the prime expert of Duchess Carmilla,” Laura questioned.

“I mean,” Mattie paused, took a sip of her coffee, then continued, “She's my sister. So I know a great deal. Also it’s the Countess.” 

“Does it really matter?” 

“Yes she is literally a Countess.”

Danny and Laura choked on their food, “You're joking.” 

“I’m am not. Her late father, Count Alexander Karnstein, held a noble title for some small claim in Austria. Since he is, in fact, the late count, and since Carmilla is his only child, she is formally Countess Carmilla Mircalla Karnstein. I wouldn't call her that though.” 

Laura felt like her head was spinning, “Well can you tell us anything else?” 

“Well she's my sister and I love her to death, but Carmilla is a royal bitch.”

“We knew this already,” Danny was about to start ranting, “Laf said that you would have some kind of additional insight into the nuances of how to get along with Carmilla. Also, what's this deal with her being a spy since age 18.” 

“It's true,” Mattie took another long drag off her coffee. Perry leaned her head on her lover’s shoulder and stared at them owlishly, happy to simply observe the interaction. 

“The German government paid for her to go to college in America on the condition that she become a field agent.” 

“So she spied on America and now I'm supposed to listen to what she says.” Danny was only just beginning to get annoyed. 

“I guess so.”

“Mattie what exactly is your job? You seem like you have more to do than just being a “Carmilla Wrangler”.” Danny’s ire was beginning to manifest physically. Her shoulders began to raise under her ears, giving her the look of having even more height. The developing tensions were starting to make Perry uneasy. Laf glanced at their friend nervously, as Perry looked like she was about to strike. Mattie on the other hand, continued to smile and reached into her bag to pull out two business cards. She handed them to the Americans. 

“Matska Belmonde, Esq.” followed by a number and address was embossed on the small card in gold calligraphy.

“So you're a lawyer.”

“Correct.” 

“So you're not a field agent,” Laura said, again pointing out the obvious.

“God no.” Mattie chuckled a little, “I leave that to Lola.”

“Then why…”

“Who better to help the government avoid the law than a defense attorney. So intelligence keeps me on retainer to assist in legal counsel. Kind of like Laf’s job.”

“Well it's not exactly the same,” interjected the Brit, “I am an official MI6 agent, but I suppose my background does have certain…benefits.” The rest of the group stared, prompting them to continue, “I suppose my medical background is useful in getting rid of bodies…” 

“Oh,” Laura turned back to her pancakes and prayed that she would never have to employ Lafontaine’s skill set. The rest of breakfast was held in silence.

She was just polishing off a hash brown when Laura remembered a point of her question from earlier, “Laf, why is there a radio already set up in our hotel room?” 

I can answer that,” said Perry, “The Black Cat almost exclusively houses foreign agents, so it's not uncommon for missions to be run from there.” 

“But we’re not going to have to do that, are we?” Laura received only a shrug in response. 

“Well look at the time. I think it's about time Danny and Laura met her majesty, don't you think, babe?” 

“I suppose so.” 

Mattie threw a wad of cash on the table and got up. The rest of the party followed and they started down the street, yelling their goodbyes and thank yous to Graz as they passed. 

They reached Carmilla’s brownstone. Mattie pulled a key out of her purse and made up the steps while the rest waited back on the sidewalk. However, before Mattie could open the door, the door itself was thrown backwards and a very irritated looking blonde woman rushed out and down the steps, pulling on a jacket and yelling obscenities behind her. Very Lou's classical could be heard playing from somewhere inside the apartment. 

Just then a loud, exclaimed “fuck” was heard from the second level and steps thundered down the stairs presumably after the unknown woman. What revealed itself on the floor of the foyer was a mess. The woman’s long, dark brown hair was a nest. Mascara from last night had gathered under her eyes and the flannel shorts and black tank top the woman wore were wrinkled and looked slightly damp. Without introduction, Laura knew this was Carmilla. She would never tell Danny, but the brunette had spent an inordinate amount of time staring at this woman’s picture, and while they were clearly the same person, the picture must not have been up to date. The almost black eyes were the same, but with new detail: a scar bisected her left eyebrow. A gold chain was present on Carmilla’s neck that hadn't been in her profile picture, the pendant of which was hidden beneath the tank top. Laura also noticed a myriad of tattoos, but was too far away to inspect them closely. 

Carmilla sucked in a long breathe, and leaned heavily against the door frame. It was in that moment that she noticed that company had arrived. Her eyes flicking past Mattie and down the line of guests, she made eye contact with Laura, who was startled to see that Carmilla seemed almost…uneasy. This feeling of unease did not escape Mattie, who rushed forward to her sister, who looked close to collapsing. 

“What's wrong?” she rushed out, mouth close to Carmilla’s ear. Carmilla whispered something in response, the rest of the conversation too quiet to hear. The countess absentmindedly toyed with the chain around her neck. The pendant was revealed to be a small gold cross, which was surprising to Laura. Carmilla didn't seem like she would be a religious person at all. Nodding slightly, Mattie went inside the brownstone while Carmilla waited patiently outside. She fished a pack of cigarettes, lit one, taking a long drag. 

“How are you Perry,” Carmilla asked. Her voice was gravely from sleep and she spoke quietly, almost as if to not startle herself. 

“I'm good, Carm. You remember Lafontaine, right?” the other woman nodded, “Can I introduce you to Danny Lawrence and Laura Hollis? They're the Americans.” 

Carmilla took another drag of her cigarette before holding her hand out to be shaken, “it’s nice to meet you I guess but I'm not at all pleased you're here.” 

“Excuse you-” 

“Carmilla can we at least get into it inside. A secure location?” Mattie had reappeared. She leaned over to her sister and Laura thought she heard her mutter, “it's safe now.” Carmilla’s mouth drew into a long line before she nodded and gestured for the rest of them to go inside. Passing through the doorway, Laura was pleased to notice that Carmilla had less than an inch on her. She was less happy to notice that Carmilla smelled like smoke, and strangely enough, a spice rack. The door shut behind them, the brunette took in her surroundings.

Lafontaine said the brownstone contained four floors. The first, which they were currently on, seemed to be comprised of a small entryway, as well as a small kitchen and dining room. The classical music was coming from a boombox in a corner, which Carmilla clambered to shut off. The walls were painted a forest green and were covered in various pieces of contemporary art. Carmilla led the group through to the dining room and gestured for them to each take a seat at the table. The table and chairs themselves were a dark oak wood. The table surface was covered in books, magazines, and other papers and Laura doubted the table was ever actually used for eating. 

“So as I was saying,” Carmilla adopted a tone of annoyance. It was well matched to her severe appearance, “I don't like that you two are here.” She gestured to Laura and Danny. 

“Why,” spat Laura. She wasn't expecting herself to so easily be able to counter the other woman. Danny looked equally unamused and the other three looked a mix of annoyed to nervous to outright over it. 

“Because you don't need to be here. I'm tired of you Americans sticking your nose in everything and thinking you're entitled to knowing everything about everything.”

“We were asked to come. Weren't we Perry? Laf?” Danny desperately turned to them for help, but the Londoner and the Scot were obviously dying very hard to stay out of it. 

“You really think you were asked?” mocked Carmilla. Danny raised from her chair to her further in Carmilla’s face. She had about a foot of height on the dark haired woman, but while someone else would shrink away under the scrutiny, Carmilla was not backing down, “I don't even know how you found out. But somehow the CIA did. And even though this information truly,” she then turned her attention to Laura, “I mean truly, do you hear me? Has nothing to do with the USA, your government ever so “politely requested” that they have agents sit in on this meeting. Do you hear me Laura Hollis? You have nothing to do with this?” 

Laura rally did not like how Carmilla was singling her out like this, “well wait a minute. How do we even know we don't need to know if we don't even know what the intelligence is? Would you just tell us already?!” Now she was starting to get heated. 

“Gladly.” Carmilla pivoted to Perry and Laf, who looked not at all pleased to be her new target, “I have knowledge of an MI6 agent being held by Soviet intelligence across the wall.” 

“Well great,” said Lafontaine, treading carefully, “can we have the information now?” 

“No.” 

“Why not…” 

Carmilla suddenly pushed herself up from the table, disturbing the mess on top of it, and very quickly walked away up the stairs. 

“Because I don't have it anymore.” A door slammed, spurring Danny, Mattie, and Perry into action. The three of them rushed up the stairs and banged on the door to the unknown room Carmilla was in. Danny tried the handle, only to find it locked. Laura and Laf followed them upstairs, and managed to pull Danny back from the door, right before she could kick it in. 

“Well where the fuck is it?!!” Danny yelled. 

They could hear Carmilla scoff from the other side of the door, “I'm not answering to you.” 

Perry tired again, “Carmilla we need to know where the information is.” 

Laura could hear a lighter flick, and presumed that the countess had lit another cigarette, “So I didn't know at the time.”

“Get on with it.”

“Right so I didn't know at the time, but that blonde you saw leaving right when you got here?” 

“More like storming out, Kitty,” said Mattie.

“Whatever. As lovely a fuck as she was, apparently she was one of the Soviet agents holding your guy from MI6. So she stole the files and stuff from me right when I was asking her to stay a little longer. Fucking rude…”

A chorus of groans sounded from the other side of the door. 

“Wait wait don't do that I'm competent.”

“Doubtful,” whispered Laura. 

“I still remember when he's being held, which is like the only important piece of information anyway.” 

“I suppose…” replied Perry. She turned to Laura and Danny, “It’s starting to look like we might have to use that radio in your hotel room after all.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from Adam and the Ants "Dog Eat Dog"


	5. Avalon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the notes and kudos! I love hearing from you guys.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Laura sat on her bed, absentmindedly twirling her wet hair into a braid before getting to bed. The event of only a few hours before swirled around in her head. Ideas of what would transpire tomorrow did the same.

“Danny, what’s on the other side of the wall,” she asked. It had been two weeks since that fateful day she and Carmilla first met. May bled into June as the group conspired a way to steal back the agent that had been stolen from the British. Carmilla, who was no less of an absolute pain, followed through with her word and proved that she did in fact remember the details of where the operative was being held, while also demonstrating a near practically perfect knowledge of every turn and back alley of Berlin. However, that did not change the fact that she had allowed the hard copies of the information to be lost in the first place, and Laura wondered, secretly hoped, if the countess would be punished in any way for her carelessness. 

The group had once again been inside Carmilla’s apartment. Still corralled to the ground floor, Laura nonetheless gained more insight to how the other woman lived. It was noon and they were again sitting at the large oak dining table. The dark haired woman had been smoking cigars this time and even though it was barely noon, the room was thick with smog and the spiced aroma of fine tobacco. 

“Can we open a window? I can barely see in here,” complained Perry, who was already moving to do so. Carmilla didn't answer and made no move to stop her. Taking another drag of the cigar, Laura watched as the perfect rings of smoke of the exhale were slowly dragged outside by the incoming draft. She shifted her gaze back to the countess. For once, Carmilla looked as though she may have gotten a decent night’s sleep. Her unkempt hair was still messy, but in a way that looked intentional. She rested her chin on her fisted left hand. “LOVE” in a stylized script was tattooed across her knuckles. Above that, on her bicep, was the head of a bright white cat, mouth open in a roar. The phrase “Terrible as the night” weaved around it in scroll. 

“Is that your cat?” 

Carmilla’s eyes had previously been keeping time with the swinging pendulum of the grandfather clock in the corner of the dining room, but the deep brown focused on Laura and she hummed at the question. 

“Your tattoo, I mean. Is that your cat?” 

A new onslaught of cigar smoke filled the air, “She was, Bagheera. She died about two years ago. Her successor lives within the walls of this very house.”

This puzzled Laura, as she had seen no evidence of a feline companion, “Really? What's her name?”

“Bagheera II.” 

Laura faced her with a skeptical look. Carmilla laughed lightly at this, “she's very shy. Likes to stay among the upper floors.” She gestured towards the ceiling, the trail of smoke from between her fingers following the motion, “don't get testy with me. Why don't you eat something. I know you get pissy when you're hungry. Or anytime really…” 

Laura forcefully stood up from the table, not wanting to be subject to the pest any longer. She made her way into the kitchen, making note of how the hardwood of the dining room shifted to a turquoise tile. The kitchen was small, but not annoyingly so. The appliances were modest, but the window over the sink had a great view of the city. She hated to admit the other woman was right, even in the safety of her own mind, but there wasn't a chance to eat that Laura wouldn't take. She opened the fridge and was mostly unsurprised at its sparse contents. There was bacon, oranges, assorted takeout containers, a suspiciously medicinal looking green glass bottle, and interestingly enough, “I didn't think there was actually anyone who drank soy milk.” Laura knew the barb wasn't very good, but she'd do anything to get under Carmilla’s skin. 

“I’ll tell you who drinks soy milk,” was shouted from the other room.

“Then do so.”

“Ok I will.

“Ok then do so.”

“People that are lactose intolerant drink soy milk.” 

“Are you lactose intolerant, Carmilla?” 

“ENOUGH.” Throughout the entire exchange, really the entire time they had been here, Danny paced in the corner of the dining room. Carmilla had summoned them to her home under the promise that all would be revealed upon their arrival. They had arrived over half an hour before and she had not delivered on her promise. Danny was just now reaching her boiling point. 

The room fell silent at the redhead’s outburst. Lafontaine sunk further into the lounge chair in the foyer. Perry stared at her bike outside from her place at the window, yearning for it the way one wait for their lover’s return from war. Her actual lover was tied up in court all day seeing at Mattie had an actual job outside of this. Laura imagined Perry would want her here merely as a distraction. 

“Now let’s all just calm down,” said Carmilla, slowly rising from the table. She leaned against the edge. Laura winced as she put her cigar out directly onto the wood, despite the fact that there was an ashtray centimeters away from her hand, “yes.” 

“Yes what?” said Danny, exasperated. 

“Yes I am lactose intolerant. That's more information than I ever wanted you two,” she pointed between the two Americans, “to have. Now you have a method to hurt me.” The room was just beginning to clear of smoke, so Carmilla chose that exact moment to reach into a drawer in the table and pull out a pack of cigarettes, offering them to the room. There were no takers so she shrugged and lit one for herself. 

Danny looked ready to commit a murder, “you always offer the room a smoke. Would you actually give me one if I took you up on it?” 

Carmilla sauntered to where Danny had finally stopped pacing, “well not you probably, but Perry smokes sometimes.”

“Please don't drag me into this.” 

Laura could see where this was going. Carmilla was practically rounding her lover for a strike and the brunette watched in horror and she took a drag and blew in out right into Danny’s face. In a flash, the redhead lunged for the dark haired woman, but Laf and Laura were able to hold the two back just in time. Perry’s head could be heard repeatedly smacking against the window pain. 

“Why have you brought us here?!” hissed Danny, struggling very successfully against Laura. 

“Laura. Needs. Papers,” Carmilla finally snapped, shrugging off Lafontaine. She threw her cigarette on the ground and Laura winced even harder this time as the tobacco was ground into the floorboards by Carmilla’s bare foot. 

“She needs her papers,” she said again, attempting to calm down. It was futile, as another thought entered that dark head of hers and she was back to being in Danny’s face, “because in an almost malicious oversight by your government…” 

“Insult America one more time or god help me.” Danny jabbed an accusatory finger into the other woman’s chest.

“God help you?,” Carmilla was reaching a fever pitch. The reached under her shirt and again pulled out the chain. Sitting next to the cross was a rabbit’s foot that Laura had failed to notice until now. Apparently Carmilla’s spiritual motivations were as muddy as her professional ones. “God help you? Because at this point the only thing left for him to do is strike me down. God nothing.” It seemed that the argument had quickly threaded into territory nobody was ready for. Perry took notice of this and she and Lafontiane moved to talk down the now nearly vibrating German. Carmilla closed her eyes and for a few seconds some deep gulping breaths. 

“As I was saying,” she started again, voice wavering, “in a governmental oversight, the only identification Laura currently has on her is her CIA card and badge, and she can't exactly go flashing that at checkpoint Charlie, not can she?” Carmilla finally opened her eyes and stared straight at Danny. The usually bemused deep brown now held only contempt and it seemed as though lines sprung up under her eyes out of thin air. 

“Soooo…we take her someplace to get that done. I'm sure Mattie or someone knows someone who can do that…,” Danny started, now treading very carefully around the dark haired spy. 

“She has to go across the wall.”

“What why,” Laura chimed in. It seemed pertinent that she get her two cents in, seeing as the conversation was about her.

“Because the guy I trust lives in East Berlin.”

“I guess it's not ideal,” continued a Danny, still choosing her words exceptionally carefully, “but if that's what's necessary, than we take her across the wall.”

“I take her across,” Carmilla responded grimly. 

“What?” and “I’m sorry?” was heard from Laura and Danny respectively. 

“I take Laura through the checkpoint and into East Berlin. Perry will be there too, for safety.”

“Well why can't I come along too?” Danny was beginning to get testy again.

Carmilla leaned back against the table again, stabling herself, “you have fakes already, yes?” Danny nodded in response. “Than it's unnecessary that you come along.”

“Now wait a minute-”

“Laura would you like to know why she doesn't need to come,” Carmilla said, quickly pivoting to the brunette. 

Danny implored the shorter girl, “Laura please don't enable her-”

“Why?”

That shut Danny up. Carmilla grinned slightly at her small victory. 

“Well you don't need papers so there's that,” she began listing reasons on her fingers, “we shouldn't bring along more people than necessary to avoid suspicion, and also,” Carmilla clapped her hands together, “you'd have no fucking idea where we'd be going and ultimately slow us down.” Before Danny could get a response in edgewise, she continued, “ah ah. Laura, I defer to you on this decision. Should Danny join us on out, galavant into uncharted territory?” 

Carmilla had a point, and Laura hated that she knew that Laura knew she had a point. Swallowing her pride, “Danny, I really don't think it's the best idea you come with.”

“Laura come on-” 

“Great! Glad that's settled. Now get out of my house.” Carmilla pointed them to the door.

Lafontaine lightly patted Danny on the shoulder and began to lead her out, “It really is the best choice.” 

Right as they were about to step outside, a flaw occurred to Laura, “Wait,” she and everyone else haunted in the doorframe, “if it's a bad idea to use my CIA ID at the checkpoint, how are you getting me across in the first place?” 

Laura was not happy to see Carmilla panic slightly at this question. “I will be faking no further questions. Now get out.”

“Great so this is a half-baked plan.”

Perry sighed next to Laura, resigned, “No it really isn't, but she's not going to reveal the rest to you either way. Let's just leave.” And so Laura, Danny, Perry, and Laf shuffled out of the brownstone, closing the door behind them. 

The window slammed shut and Laura turned back in alarm. To her shock, the glass was somehow already starting to fog with smoke again. 

Walking down the front steps, the group exchanged plans to possibly meet again for dinner, it if not, they'd probably see each other the following day. Perry and Lafontaine got on the back of Lola’s bike and sped off down the street. Laura and Danny turned to their car. They had rented a car a few days after arriving in Berlin. It was a red station wagon with wood paneling on the side. Not the most attractive car, it would get the job done. 

The two women climbed inside, Danny the driver, and Laura in the passenger seat. They sat silently for a second in shocked contemplation over the situation that had just unfolded. 

Laura broke the silence, “Does Carmilla even have a car?” Another second passed, then the two of them broke out into hysterics, too exhausted to control themselves. 

Danny and Laura had spent the rest of the afternoon exploring the city around their hotel. Finally returning to The Black Cat in the late evening, Laura has immediately taken the longest shower of her life in an attempt to wash all the smoke off of her. She still wasn't sure if it had worked. 

The braid she had been working on complete, Laura turned to the desk chair to find her companion once again engrossed in Doctor Faustus. Danny absentmindedly reached to push her reading glasses further up her slim and pointed nose. 

“Did you hear me?” Laura questioned, a little laughter in her voice. 

“Hm? Oh I'm sorry,” the redhead responded, finally tearing herself away from the book, “Could you repeat that?” 

“What's on the other side of the wall?” 

Danny blinked for a moment, put down her book, and folded her glasses. She turned to Laura, “well, people. The US still does a lot of fear mongering about the Soviet, but what gets left out a lot is that the people of east Berlin are just having it really hard right now. Public works and such aren't getting funded very well and they're under a lot heavier surveillance than we are here. But it's not like you cross the wall and die instantly. You just have to be more careful.”

“Oh.” That was a lot more logical and calm than what Laura was expecting. She had been bracing herself for practically the entire day. She imagined that as soon as she and Carmilla crossed the checkpoint, murders upon murders of crows would block out the sun and they would immediately fall through a giant crack in the earth. Apparently, that wouldn't happen.

“Are you nervous?” Danny’s voice brought Laura out of her thoughts. 

“Yes.” It was true, and the brunette was too tired to put on a brave face. 

“Come here,” and Laura did. The redhead pulled her onto her lap and rested her forehead against her lover’s, “You'll be fine. You don't even have to talk to Carmilla.” Then Danny kissed Laura, and all thoughts about anything else melted away. The push and pull of their mouths grew more heated, and Danny moved her mouth to the other girl’s neck. Laura groaned and wrapped her arms around the other’s neck. Suddenly, without warning, Danny stood up, hands on Laura’s butt. Laura shrieked and wrapped her legs tighter around Danny’s waist in an effort to not fall flat on her back. Still entwined they moved to the bed, and Laura was gently placed down as Danny got on top of her. The heat of anticipation was building between them as Danny pulled her shirt off and Laura followed her example. They were about to go to bed, so neither of them were wearing bras. 

Laura, basking in the sight of her lover’s toned chest, hoped Danny was doing the same, as she couldn't tear her eyes away from the sight in front of her to check. Then, Danny dove back into Laura’s neck, but continued her descent. She stopped occasionally, doting on Laura’s breasts, before finally trailing down to the waistband of Laura’s pajama pants. 

“Are you sure?” was breathed out from between Laura’s legs. 

“Yes.” And like that, Danny hooked her fingers under the pants, and along with Laura’s underwear, dragged them down her legs and threw them onto the floor. She took a moment to study the sight before her. Laura gulped in anticipation, but threw her head back in a gasp when Danny’s mouth finally reached its final destination. 

Hours later, the two women were awoken from a thick sleep by the ringing of the phone. Danny was trying her best to ignore it, so it was Laura who reached over her companion. Hand on the receiver, she took a moment to admire the scene before her. Danny, as was Laura, was still naked. The redhead was wrapped up in sheets and had a look of untidiness, which was undoubtedly Laura’s doing. The brunette smiled slightly and picked up the phone. 

“Hello?” She greeted, voice still thick from sleep.

“Hollis is that you?” 

“Oh Chris,” thought Laura, letting her face fall onto a balled fist. It was way too early to be hearing Carmilla’s voice. Any positive feeling Carried over from the night before, quickly evaporated once she was reminded of the business at hand.

“Yeah it's me...look Carmilla if you could just give me 15 minutes…”

“You have ten.” Carmilla’s voice left no room for argument, “I'm waiting in the lobby for you.” The phone clicked, signaling the conversation was over. Laura sighed and placed down the phone. She looked over at Danny, who was still somehow blissfully asleep, and decided not to wake her, instead scribbling down a quick note to her on the hotel stationary. She lightly kissed the other woman’s cheek, and made her way to the bathroom to quickly get ready. 

After 11 minutes, Laura touched down on the floor of the lobby, and before she even had time to greet the desk attendant, was forcefully dragged out of The Black Cat on onto the street. The rumbling of a bike engine started up. 

Apparently, Carmilla did have a car because parked at the curb in front of Perry on her bike was an absolute junker. A dark gray coupe sat in front of her, and from what Laura could tell, it was an absolute shitbox. Dents and scratches everywhere, there were major pieces either missing, or held together by duct tape. She had no idea what kind of car it was, but maybe Carmilla liked it that way. 

A “get in” was grunted beside her, and Laura turned to finally get a glance at Carmilla. She was dressed in all black down to the wayfarers she wore. The only slight pop of color was the deep brown leather of her combat boots. 

Laura went around to the passenger side, being very careful out of fear that the car would explode at the slightest touch. Opening the door, she slid onto the cracked leather interior and took note of how a pair of pink fuzzy dice were hanging from the rear view.

Carmilla slid next to her and started the car, “I'm glad you didn't slam the door. It fell off twice last month from people doing that.” She turned behind them and shot a very pointed look at Perry. Laura only sat there horrified. 

And then they were off, with Perry following them. The car made terrifying thumping and screeching sounds as they drove off. The atmosphere inside the car was awkward. Laura stared out the window while Carmilla kept her eyes firmly on the road. Her driving posture, like everything else about her, was very blasé. She slouched in her seat with only her right hand on the wheel, the other hanging outside the car. Laura noticed with disgust that the countesses’ knuckles on her right hand were tattooed with the word “LUST”, and she assumed that the right hand got a lot more action than the left. The day was overcast, but still hot, and a gentle breeze floated through the car, causing Carmilla’s wild locks to flitter slightly. 

A few minutes later and the awkwardness was beginning to become unbearable. Laura could tell by the approach of the wall that they were coming up on their destination, but she wasn’t sure she could make it. Plus, there were still questions left unanswered.

“Is there a specific reason we’re doing this now?” I just mean that we’re most likely about to do at least one illegal thing, so wouldn't we want to do that under the cover of darkness?”

“No.”

“Why not? came Laura’s annoyed reply. 

“Well it's currently twenty to noon, and we need to get there in about ten minutes,” Carmilla drawled. If she was annoyed with the questioning, she wasn't showing it, although she wasn't being particularly forthcoming either. Laura sat in silence waiting for an answer. The other woman drew her mouth into a hard line and said, “The checkpoint guard changes shifts at noon, and I want to time it so we get there before the shift, but come back to the west side after so we have two different guards.” 

“Ok but why-”

“I'm not going to tell you. At least not until we’re back on this side,” and with that, the conversation was over and they were back to stifling awkward silence. The only sound being the various rumbles of the junker and the steady engine of Perry’s bike. Laura picked at her nails. Carmilla continued her unwavering gaze on the road. 

In an attempt to alleviate the mood, “You know, my mom died when I was seven,” Laura said. Her gaze shifted to the side of Carmilla’s face and she noticed a muscle twitch in her cheek. 

“I...see...” 

“I just bring it up because I heard that your dad died and I thought maybe things wouldn't be so tense if we found something in common.” Laura knew it was a long shot, but she really believed the whole Berlin ordeal would be smoother if Carmilla wasn't so hostile with her and Danny. 

Unfortunately, “and why would you think I would want to bond with you over that?” Carmilla’s tone was very clipped, and Laura was thankful that somewhere within the other woman, she was trying very hard to exercise restraint. 

“Like I said I just thought maybe if we had something in common-”

“Laura, I don't know why the fuck you thought it would appropriate to bring that up out of nowhere. Why would you think it would be appropriate to at all? How did you even find out? My father was murdered in an act of political aggression when I was ten years old, so unless your mom died in some kind of horrifically violent death, don't even start with me, because we will not be able to relate.”

Laura’s eyes drilled holes into the side of Carmilla’s taught, angry, red face and tears began to prick at the corners of her eyes. She was expecting the other woman to be difficult, but she wasn't ready to be steamrolled and scolded by someone she had met only two weeks prior. She forced herself to tear her eyes away and focus on the scenery. The car had stopped in a long line of vehicles waiting to be admitted to East Berlin. The wall, now roughly 40 feet away, was an imposing sight and only made Laura feel more trapped. 

Trying her very best to keep her voice still, “My mom died of lung cancer. I watched her waste away for two years before we were finally able to put her to rest.” She slowly turned back to the driver. Carmilla, whose face had returned to its normal paleness, was white knuckling the steering wheel, and the veins in her neck still threatened to burst.

“We’re almost through. Just, please keep quiet for a few minutes. Please.” 

A few minutes later, the car pulled up to the attendants booth. Although Laura had been diligently listening to her language tapes, their German was too fast to understand. Surprisingly, Carmilla flashed her badge and said something else. Then guard then solemnly nodded his head and waved them through to East Berlin. 

Immediately, Laura knew that Danny was right. Overall, the east side looked basically the same as the west. However, it was clear that this side of the city just looked emaciated. The people they passed looked more gaunt and the buildings, mostly dirty and grey with soot, looked dark and damaged. Soon enough, they pulled up to a shop with a sign above the door that read “Berliner Printing and Copying”. The sign was wood with the letters painted in gold paint that was severely chipped. The windows and door had gates pulled closed, and the store itself didn't even look open. 

The two women couldn't get out of the car fast enough, but upon stepping out, Carmilla was abruptly yanked backward by the collar by a very pissed off looking Perry. Laura couldn't hear what they were talking about, and Carmilla was beginning to look sheepish, which overall didn't rule out a whole lot. After a good minute, Perry released her and got back on the bike. With a shouted “I'll circle the block” she was off. The dark haired woman opened the trunk of the car and pulled out a baseball jacket. She shrugged it on and Laura shuddered to think of how that must feel in the heat. She watched Carmilla step up to the locked door, and after performing an intricate series of knocks, a thin man revealed himself and ushered the two women inside. The lights were all off inside the store and although it was difficult for Laura to see, it was filled with various kinds of printers, paper, and copies, all covered with a thin layer of dust. The air inside was so hot and thick from poor ventilation, that it almost made the back of Laura’s throat hurt. 

“Is he here?” Carmilla whispered to the man.

“He's waiting in the back as promised,” he responded, and led them to the back room. Carmilla knocked and a muffled “meow meow” could be heard from inside. The dark haired woman rolled her eyes and pushed open the door. The room was an office for the most part. One side held a large desk, the other had a printer, a camera set up, and a large assortment of blank official documentation. 

“Never meow at me again. It's now funny.” Laura turned back towards the desk to see who Carmilla was talking to. A man swirled around in a rickety desk chair. His hair was shaggy and long, as was his mustache. His baby blue tracksuit matched the blue of his eyes. 

“Come on Kitty it is all in good fun.” He stood from the chair and gave Carmilla a hard slap on the back, “is this her?” He gestured to Laura. His accent was thick and fairly difficult to understand. 

“Yes. Laura? May I introduce Wilson Kirsch. Smuggler and forger extraordinaire.” He was fairly tall and imposing, and when he shook Laura’s hand, she felt her arm nearly dislocate. Nonetheless, he seemed fairly jolly. 

“Please call me Kirsch. I am just a humble printmaker. My father was a printmaker, his father was a printmaker and so on,” Kirsch said with a wink. “Now, Ms. Hollis, if you would please step in front of the background,” he gestured in front of the camera, “and we can get this done.” He moved to are the picture, “Remember. No smiling. No one smiles in mother Russia.” He gave her a toothy grin, one that had at least three gold teeth. With a flash, Laura stepped away from the camera and Kirsch went to quick work fabricating the papers. A moment later, Laura was presented with a west German passport and identification papers. “Laura Hollis” she was no more. According to this, her new persona was “Lana Holloway”. 

“Thank you Kirsch,” said Carmilla, slyly slipping the man a couple marks. She then slipped him a couple more and in return, he slipped her what looked to be a magazine, which she promptly put in her back pocket and tucked under the jacket. Laura understood that it was time for them to go, so she brushed pass Carmilla through the exit. Carmilla stumbled a little, and maybe Laura hit a little too hard, but she was still mad about their altercation from the car. The two women waved goodbye to the desk attendant in the front of the store, and were outside once again looking at the gray landscape right when Perry circled her way back around the corner. She idled the bike and sent a very pointed look Carmilla’s way. The entire ride back through the checkpoint was spent in strained silence. Carmilla’s it had worked. Another guard was on duty when they exited back to the western side, and with Laura’s new identifications, everything went smoothly. When they finally once again pulled up to The Black Cat, Laura slammed the door as hard as she could on the way out of the car in an attempt to break it. Sadly, it held strong. 

Laura thundered up the four flights of stairs and flung open the door to find the room thankfully empty. As much as she liked Danny, she needed some time alone. Flinging herself down on the bed, she screamed into the pillow and allowed herself to sob. Every anxiety surrounding this trip came out in tears and roughly half an hour later, Laura found herself drifting off into a nap. She was then, for the second time that day, awaken by the phone ringing. It had been around 1:30 when she fell asleep. It was now almost six and the room had dimmed considerably. Danny was still nowhere to be seen. The brunette hadn't been sleeping very well recently, but between the sex and the stress, how could she?

She groggily reached for the phone, “yeah?”

“Hey Laura…”

She took a minute to scream into the pillow again, “why the hell are you calling me right now, Carmilla.”

“It's just...I wanted to…or rather felt I needed to…,” whatever she was trying to say was obviously giving the countess great pain, “apologize…for what I said in the car. So…I'm sorry…” Although the other woman couldn't see, Laura’s face was one of complete unamusement. 

“Who put you up to this?” She asked, even though she probably already knew to answer. 

A beat of silence and then, “Perry.”

“Right ok I'm going to hang up now,” but before she could another question entered her mind, “actually never mind. Tell me what you said to the guard going into East Berlin or else I'm going to tell Danny what you said to me.”

A sound almost like a growl made its way through the phone, “I told him you were a foreign spy and I was taking you through the checkpoint to give you to the appropriate authorities. Obviously, we couldn't meet the same guard on the way back, which we didn't, so it's not like it matters anyway.” 

The look of unamusement was left unchanged. Laura clicked her tongue before responding, “Well Carmilla I hope we never have to meet that first guard again,” and she slammed the phone back onto the stand. Laura bit her bottom lip, considering her next move. She stood, then flopped back down on the bed. She had just woken up from a four hour nap, but every interaction with Carmilla took out all her energy, so she was once again exhausted. 

There was currently nothing better to do than sleep, so Laura did, and begged for dreams to take her anywhere but Berlin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title is mainly taken from Avalon, the legendary seat of King Arthur, but in terms of maintaining the theme, it's also inspired by Roxy Music's album/song of the same name. 
> 
> I really liked the irony of equating East Berlin during the Cold War to Avalon because Avalon is legendary and regal, whereas East Berlin had a reputation of being an almost lawless, godless place. 
> 
> Again thanks for all the support! I'll try to update again soon.


	6. War, Children, It's Just a Shot Away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update. Things have been busy between school and stuff at home. Hopefully, I'll be back to updating around once a week again. 
> 
> I love to hear from you guys, so don't be afraid to comment.

Laura knew that at this point she was just being spiteful, but she really didn’t want to go. Gazing out the windows of the hotel room, it was obvious that the evening sky was brewing a storm. No matter what, whether it was on the way there, or the way back, she was getting wet. It seemed that no call was a good call when in Berlin, and the one she had received around noon was no exception. 

She had been enjoying the day. Research and preparation on their extraction mission had stalled considerably, so Laura took advantage of the lull. She was sitting in one of the many parlors adjacent to the hotel foyer, when the phone in the lobby rang, though she paid it no wine. A stand down the street sold copies of the New York Times, and Laura was relaxing and reading the culture section. 

“Ms. Stanwyck.”

Laura took a long sip of her earl grey. 

“Ms. Stanwyck there is a call for you.” 

She continued to be caught up in herself. 

“Ms. Stanwyck please you have a call waiting.”

“Shit!” Laura startled. The man attending the lobby had shaken her out of her stupor. 

“You have a call waiting,” he repeated. 

“Ok I heard you,” she responded, catching her breath. Laura was beyond annoyed. As much as she enjoyed the company of Danny, the other woman was spending the day in various conference calls, and Laura had been looking forward to the alone time for days. 

She leaned heavily on the desk, sighed, and picked up the phone, “yeah?”

“Laura?” It was Mattie. Not the worst person she could be hearing from right now.

“Yeah it’s me.” 

“Great. I’m glad I got a hold of you,” she paused a moment before continuing, “I need a favor…”

Laura signed again and chewed her bottom lip, “what.”

She could tell the other woman was hesitating on the line. That did not bode well for Laura’s relaxing afternoon. The brunette glanced at the clock. Quarter to 12. 

“I need you to take some papers over to Carmilla.”

“Mattie no-”

“Please,” Mattie cut her off, “it’s important. It’s about the extraction.”

Laura ran a hand over her face and through her hair, “I mean... why can’t you or Perry or Laf do it.”

“Well I’m in court today and Laf is at some medical seminar.”

“And Perry?”

“She doesn’t want to,” Mattie said, matter-of-factly. Laura wasn’t about to fight her on that. Seeing as Danny was otherwise occupied, she guessed that she was the last resort. She smacked her hand on the hard wood of the desk in anger. 

“I guess. What do I have to do?”

Mattie must have been holding her breath, because a fast rush of air came through the phone, “Oh thank god. Here’s what I need you to do.” Mattie then went on a long winded explanation of an all too complicated method for retrieving the files. When Laura finally found the file folder taped to the underside of a park bench, she almost blacked out with rage in discovering that the documents consisted of a single one page document that had about a paragraph of text on it. In Laura’s opinion, the question of why Carmilla couldn’t pick it up herself wasn’t even worth answering at that point. 

So that had taken up her afternoon, and now Laura once again sat in her hotel room out of spite. The document sat on the desk chair and she was waiting until the last possible minute to leave to make inconvenience Carmilla as much as possible. Laura realized that she was also probably inconveniencing Mattie, as well as the mission in general. As much as it seemed like it was better to have Ms. Belmonde as an ally, Carmilla would never be nothing more than the largest thorn ever stuck in anyone’s side. 

It was now nearing eight in the evening and Laura figured this was about as late as she could get away with. Danny, in her infinite wisdom, had not been sure when she would return and thus left Laura with the rental car. She continued to gaze out the window at the street below. The incoming clouds only served to accelerate the setting of the sun. Her fingers twitched and Laura stared at the streetlight across the street. She thought about praying for fire and brimstone or anything to get her out of the task at hand. Piety, however, had failed her for the last time over 15 years ago. Carmilla’s level of hypocrisy was amazing to the brunette. How such a dumpster fire of a person could claim to believe in a god was beyond her. On the other hand, Laura thought that is was those most troubled who needed the most guidance.

She finally gave in to the demands of Matska Belmonde. Laura popped a piece of gum in her mouth and finally made her way downstairs to the car. Due to the weather and the lateness of the hour, there was little traffic, though she still had time to herself to think. The day Carmilla took her across the wall had been a week prior and the sting of the other woman’s words had faded. Laura’s contempt for the Countess had stayed the same. She sneered and popped her gum. At that same instant, lightning hit somewhere to her left and the downpour began. A growing portion of her wished for the rain to wash away the entire city. The two Americans had only been in town for about a month and a half, yet in a moment of self-reflection, it troubled Laura how much more sardonic she had become in such a short amount of time. She thought back to the plane ride and how she had marveled at the cursed city from above. All the light, first inviting and warm, now burned her eyes with a dull white heat. The city was constantly on fire, fast and hot, and Laura figured that soon enough it become caught up in its own inferno, as if Ares himself had grown tired of playing in the streets. One could only hope they were long gone at that point.

Thunder and lighting continued to flash and grumble around the car, keeping time with the popping of Laura’s gum. In what seemed like no time at all, the brunette found herself pulling up under the poplar trees in front of Carmilla’s brownstone. She shut off the car and allowed herself one more moment of silence before stepping out into the storm. From her place on the street, Laura was surprised to see the entire house lit from within. Save for the interloping lovers, Carmilla lived alone. Laura hoped she didn’t currently have someone over. She pulled her overcoat up to her neck, and quickly stepped out of the car, concealing the document from the torrent within her coat. 

Hobbling up the front steps, Laura rang the bell, hoping for swift respite from the storm. Despite the June heat, she began to shiver. The sound of movement came from the other side of the door. The door was thrown open, and Laura winced at the sudden abundance of light. Standing before her was not Carmilla, but a child. A little blonde girl stood on the other side of the doorway. She was clad in dark denim overalls and a wary face. The large fluffy cat in her arms was pure white. Laura assumed the feline was Bagheera II, but the girl? She had no idea. 

“Evie who is it?” That was Carmilla. Her husky voice carried down the stairs from somewhere on the second floor. 

The girl scrunched her face further and her hazel eyes stared into Laura’s, “Who are you?” 

“Uhhh…” 

This answer failed to satisfy the one called “Evie”, and the cat began squirming in her arms. The door began to shut in the brunette’s face. 

“Laura! My name is Laura,” Laura rushed out.  
“It’s Laura,” Evie screamed back up at Carmilla, “are you one of her girlfriends?” This question was directed back at Laura. The American was still waiting out in the rain. The awning overhead kept her head dry, but the back of her wool overcoat was becoming regrettably soaked. 

“God no,” maybe that was too forceful of an answer for the little girl, but it was the truth. 

“Send her up. She’s the one we’ve been waiting for,” Carmilla yelled again, “and put the cat down.” Evie did as she was told and quickly ushered Laura inside, then stumbled up the stairs herself. Laura stayed rooted in the foyer, still attempting to take in the situation. A little blonde head with a dark arched eyebrow peered down at her from the second floor landing. Laura took it as a cue to follow. 

In the few times she had been inside the brownstone, Laura had only seen the first floor and the bathroom off the second floor landing. Turning the corner, Laura found a large den and what looked to be a study off the side of the main room. The den was cozy. A large cracked leather couch sat in the middle, flanked on both sides by matching leather recliners. Scooby-Doo flickered on the tv and Evie scrambled to sit down in front of it. Coffee table books were stacked on top of the glass table and the walls were covered in drawings and art. The floor was covered in a large, ornate Persian rug and Laura was careful to remove her shoes before stepping onto it from her place near the stairs. A mini fridge sat in the corner. Laura agreed that it would be a pain to go up and down the stairs between the den and the kitchen if one wanted something to drink.

“Aunt Carm can I have some juice?” Evie asked, twisting herself to face one of the recliners. Laura followed her gaze to find Carmilla lounging, her bare feet on the table. She was wearing basketball shorts and a light blue sweatshirt, the text of which was obscured by the Toshiba laptop she was diligently working on. Every couple seconds she paused her typing to either tap her fingers against the arm of the chair or to push thick black glasses back up her sharp nose. Her dark hair was pulled up into a messy bun. 

“Go ahead. You know where it is,” she replied, not looking up from her work. The typing stopped altogether, and Laura was gestured closer to the leather chair. “Do you have your sidearm on you?” Carmilla whispered. Laura did. Half the time she didn’t even think about it. Ever since she graduated her training, carrying a gun had just become a fact of her life. It became part of her morning routine: brush her teeth, get dressed, make sure she’s locked and loaded. Laura nodded in response. Carmilla set down the computer and hopped up from the chair, gesturing for the American to follow her into the study. 

The study, as opposed to the rooms on the floor below, was in a much neater state, and was probably utilized much less. Bookshelves lined one of the walls, and a large painting was on the opposite. It was black and white. A smartly dressed woman contorted in a long stretch, partially obscuring her face. Laura found the form compelling, and could appreciate that maybe the countess had some sense of taste.  
“Give me your gun,” Carmilla said, drawing the other woman out of her observations. Behind the desk where the dark haired woman said, Laura windows leading out into another gorgeous view of the city. 

“Why.”

“I’m going to lock it up for the duration of your visit. I don’t like having guns out in the open around the kid,” she replied, reaching for Laura’s sidearm. The shorter woman was struck by Carmilla’s practicality and caution. She didn’t like the feeling. Handing it over, Laura watched as a drawer within the desk was unlocked and her gun was gingerly placed inside before being sealed away. Carmilla nodded resolutely and walked away, but before Laura could follow her, a diploma on the wall caught her eye. 

“You went to Columbia? I went to NYU!” At that, Carmilla turned and gestured to her chest. “Columbia Women’s Soccer” was emblazoned on it. 

“What was your major?”

“Philosophy.”

Laura shot Carmilla an incredulous look. Their shared academic civic pride had distracted Laura from how she did not actually like the other woman. Now she remembered why. Of course someone as holier-than-thou as Countess Carmilla Mircalla Karnstein had majored in philosophy. For a moment, their gazes held, when Carmilla broke into a sharp toothed smile and light laugh. 

“Oh my god you totally believed me for a minute. No I was a double major in studio art and political science. Philosophy was my minor though.”

Disgusted by the deception, Laura took the file out from inside her coat and smacked it on the coffee table, making her way out of the room. 

“Wait no stay awhile. If only to stay out of the rain.”

Laura was caught off guard by the kindness laced in the other woman’s voice. She did want to stay out of the storm, so she sighed and shrugged off her coat, placing it on the back of the couch. She took a seat. 

“Carmilla, whose child is this,” she hissed, not wanting to be overheard by the girl in question. 

“I’m Yvonne and I’m 5,” she little girl responded, not even bothering to turn around. Carmilla smiled broadly at her niece. 

“She’s Yvonne and she’s five,” the German said, once again pushing her glasses up her nose once again, “She’s Will’s kid. My brother.” Carmilla trilled her fingers on the armchair. It was a little distracting. Laura realized that that was probably on purpose and that this was the first time she was looking at the countess directly, instead of through a cloud of smoke. 

“Do you need to take a smoke break…?” 

Carmilla took a deep breath through her nose, “No I don’t smoke around kids.” Laura was beginning to hate Carmilla even more. She hated how someone who at first came across as so awful and standoffish could be nuanced. She wanted Carmilla to be a straight shooting terrible person. The fact that she had any regard for any other humans was angering. 

Laura took a centering breath as to not explode at the other woman in front of a five-year-old, “So where’s Will?”

Carmilla’s hand had moved to drumming on the side of her face, “At some kind of literary event I’d imagine. She’s spending the night,” she gestured to Evie, “you’re excited to have a sleepover with Aunt Carm, right honey?”

Evie turned around, a large, toothy grin on her face, “Yeah. I like Aunt Mattie, but Perry…”

“You don’t even have to finish that sentence kid,” Carmilla chuckled, “it’s time for bed soon though, alright?”

A yelled “ok” came from the floor. Carmilla’s niece had returned her attention to the television. Carmilla herself turned her attention to the document on the table. It did not take long for her to read it. She sighed and once again turned towards Laura. 

“Did you read this?” Laura shook her head. “Well you should have. It concerns us.” Carmilla handed it over. The contents of the dossier were short, but effective. It was a fax that had been sent to Mattie’s law office. The actual information involved was from a concerned onlooker: a mole in soviet intelligence. It described how Theo, the British operative, was being tortured for information, and the whistleblower speculated that he did not have much time left to live if he was not rescued soon. Laura was not blind to the implications. If Theo died in captivity before they could even attempt to get him out, it would be the worst case scenario. 

“Why didn’t Mattie just sent this to you directly?” Laura questioned. 

Carmilla pinched the bridge of her nose, “I don’t have a fax machine, but she informed me that you would be dropping it off for me. Speaking of which,” Laura winced, as she guessed the topic of the fight they were about to have, “why did it take you so long to get here? Mattie called me around one. You didn’t get here until like 8:30. What happened Laura?”

“You deserved to wait,” said Laura, trying her best to hold her ground against the countesses’ accusatory gaze. 

“Excuse me?” Carmilla was seething at this point. 

“I said you deserved to wait.”

“Are you so petty that- is this about what I said last week because I already apologized,” she was off, pacing around the room in a flurry. Evie was trying her best to ignore the fight occurring behind her. 

“Barely,” Laura mumbled out the side of her mouth, unfortunately not quiet enough. 

“So you admit it! You are a child Laura Hollis. I get it. I’m abrasive-”

‘Abrasive?? You have a personality like steel wool. Someone has to hold you accountable for your actions,” Laura crossed her arms over her chest, nails nearly drawing blood from the skin of her palms. 

With that comment, Carmilla whirled back around to her, eyes saucer wide and standing stock still, “What makes you think that you have the authority to do that? You compromised this extraction. I should report you to the CIA.”

“Wha? How-”

“God you’re so stupid,” Carmilla responded, doubled over in rage, “If you had gotten this to me around, say, two, I could have mobilized some of my contacts this afternoon to gather more information. Now it’s too late at night and Theo’s life hangs in the balance because you are upset that I don’t care about the death of your mommy 15 years ago.”

“Why do you have to bring that up again?” Both of them were screaming at that point, and Evie had had enough. The little girl ran out of the room and up the stairs, presumably to one of the bedrooms.

Carmilla’s mouth drew in to a hard line, “I think it’s time you leave.” She took Laura’s overcoat from the back of the couch and held it out, “Never do anything so petty again. People’s lives matter.” Laura angrily took the coat and made her way out of the house as quickly as possible. The drive back to the hotel was spent in complete silence, save the ongoing storm. 

Close to tears, Laura burst into the room and saw that thankfully Danny was finally back. 

“Hey,” the redhead said, immediately noticing her lover’s distress, “what’s wrong.”

“I have to call Mattie.”

“Uh ok, go ahead.” So Laura did. 

“Whoever this is, you could not have called at a worse time,” Mattie picked up. The other woman’s voice was uncharacteristically breathy and she could hear Perry in the background asking her lover to come back to bed. 

“Mattie it’s Laura. I did something bad,” Laura rushed out. She was tired and it was taking almost all the brunette’s energy to maintain her composure. 

More rustling could be heard in the background, “What is it?” Mattie’s voice took on a note of severity, no doubt one utilized often in the courtroom. 

“I was being petty and Carmilla was being perfectly hospitable for once and then she wasn’t and for one I think it was warranted. And also there was this kid.” Laura was unable to stop the flow of tears as she grew more hysterical. Danny rushed the bed to comfort her. 

“Laura it’s ok, take a breath,” the redhead whispered. It was no use. The brunette grew only more exasperated. 

“I could have delivered the document to Carmilla hours ago, but I was withholding them because she said something really mean to me a week ago, and if I had known what the information was, I wouldn’t have done that but it’s too late and now Carmilla’s going to report me.”

A drawn out sign came through the receiver, “Laura it’s ok. It’s not like we didn’t know Theo was in trouble. Just don’t do that again. I’ll talk to her for you. She’s all bark and no bite. Is Danny there?”

“Yeah.” Laura sniffed a little. 

“Good. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to get back to my evening,” Mattie replied coolly. Perry’s gleeful giggle was cut off by a click. Laura sat on the bed, receiver still clutched in her hands. 

After a moment, Danny broke the silence, “hey are you going to be ok?” She rubbed the brunette’s shoulders. Laura only shrugged in response. “Mattie said she’d take care of it.”

With that, Laura slammed the receiver down on it’s holder and began tearing at her hair. Her anguish soon melting into rage for what seemed like the umpteenth time since their arrival in Berlin, “I wish she wouldn’t.”

“Why…” The tall woman only grew more concerned. 

“I don’t need people to take care of me like that. I am not a child. I don’t want to prove Carmilla right. 

“Hey now,” Danny started, pulling her companion back to sit beside her on the bed, “you have no experience with this kind of thing. We’re just trying to get you acclimated... “

Laura had no way to stop the words coming out of her mouth, “And whose fault is that,” she spat accusingly at Danny. She knew it was unfounded and completely unfair to blame the other woman for her blunder. It was almost even unfair to blame Carmilla. The unprofessionalism was completely her doing. Still, she saw how her words cut her lover, and Danny recoiled slightly in response. 

“Well I know you’re not blaming me…”

Laura chewed her bottom lip and averted her gaze to the window out of shame. The storm continued to rage outside, accented by lightning hits every couple seconds. Next to her, Danny let out a breath neither of them noticed she had been holding. 

“Let’s talk about something else,” she rubbed gentle circles on Laura’s back and leant forward to press her lips into the brunette’s shoulder. The shorter of the two failed to respond to any of those actions. ‘You mentioned something about a kid on the phone with Mattie?”

Laura blinked, “Oh. Yeah,” her voice was suddenly very hoarse, “Yvonne. She’s Carmilla’s niece. Her brother Will’s kid.” 

“Oh. I wonder if we’ll get to meet him.” Danny’s tone was completely neutral. 

“Shit.” Laura allowed her head to smack down into her hands, “I left my gun at Carmilla’s apartment.”

“What?” Danny tried to question but Laura waved her off. 

“Actually, I can’t think about that right now. Hopefully Mattie will get it back for me,” Laura stated. She rose from the bed and made her way to the bathroom, shedding the day’s clothes on the way. 

“Laura,” the redhead’s voice was a little panic stricken, “The fact that Carmilla has your sidearm sounds like kind of a big deal. Maybe we should call-”

“Danny, please,” the brunette cut her off, “I am tired down to my bones. I just need to get some sleep.”

“As you wish.”

And sleep they did, at least on Danny’s part. She was dead to the world. Laura on the other hand, could not let herself go. She thought again of the raging inferno that was Berlin, and of the storm raging just outside her window. How much rain would it take to wash away everything in its wake? An arc load, thought Laura, an arc load. 

A street lamp flickered on the street below and could be seen through the curtains, which were not completely drawn. Once again, the brunette attempted to extinguish it and slip away into unconsciousness. No such luck. The beams continued to glimmer almost in time with the rushing of the blood in Laura’s own ears, which in turn, almost completely drowned out the storm. 

She hoped Will was nothing like his sister. As much as she loathed the countess, there were layers upon layers of deep, ink like tragedy that her entire being was steeped in and it compelled the brunette to become more and more fascinated with Carmilla’s story, as well as the lives of those adjacent to her. As much as Laura hated to get her hands dirty, she could recognize that the time to do so was fast approaching. In Berlin, hours ticked by like seconds, and the grim reaper sprinted through the streets, growing ever closer to the other side of the wall, ever closer to Theo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from The Rolling Stone's "Gimme Shelter". 
> 
> Here's the painting I reference that hangs in Carmilla's study: https://www.thebroad.org/art/robert-longo/untitled-men-cities-ellen
> 
> Again, thanks for reading!


	7. He Sees the City's Ripped Backsides

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the comments and kudos and such! I love writing this story and I love how much you guys like it. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy.

The early afternoon sun was pleasant. An entire week of rain had subsided, and finally June was beginning to feel like June. It was warm. Laura admired the length, or lack thereof of Danny’s denim shorts from her place beside her at the picnic table. Tempers had cooled from earlier that week, so Mattie had decided to get the group together for a day of fun. Laura looked forward to getting to know a different facet of Berlin. Nonetheless, tension simmered under the jovial surface, as progress on their extraction mission had once again stalled.

She had been reassured time and time again that her blunder hadn’t been disastrous, but the hours she wasted still ate at Laura. Carmilla was still barely talking to her, not that that was a total loss. Still, the short brunette couldn’t help but feel ashamed at how she’d let down the team. Although The Countess was quick to anger, for once Laura contemplated that the reaction may have been warranted. 

Shaking herself out of her thoughts, Laura tried to focus on the situation at hand. She truly was having a nice day. Mattie was acting as an impromptu tour guide, and had taken them to a farmer’s market for lunch. It was nice. She rested her chin on her fist and surveyed the rest of the park. Nearby, Perry messed around with her revolver to amuse Mattie. Like her motorcycle, the redhead’s sidearm was vintage as well. It suited her. The gun spun around her fingers like a top, before coming to a sharp stop with the barrels pointed forward. She then tipped the cowboy hat that sat atop her mess of curls. Although Laura was too far away to hear exactly what the scot was saying, it was obvious that she was doing a pretty bad impression of John Wayne. Mattie, finding her lover endearing, laughed loudly and freely, before pulling Perry into a kiss. Laura was jealous of them. They were a beautiful couple, and Laura wondered if they had always been so comfortable with each other, or if they, just like every other couple, faced significant setbacks. Someday soon she would get the story out of one of them, she just didn’t know how. 

Laura also wondered if she would ever find someone so easily as Perry and Mattie did. It was very easy to be with Danny. They had never sat down and codified their relationship status, but Laura felt comfortable self-identifying as the tall woman’s girlfriend. Things with Danny were easy, but one couldn’t help but wonder if that was the most fulfilling kind of love. A tragic romance never ended well, Laura thought. Romeo and Juliet had loved each other instantly, but one must only read the first line of the play to know how they turned out. It was silly to compare oneself to fiction, and it wasn’t like Laura was looking to marry Danny within the next couple days. She just... wondered, and it was no crime to wonder.

In all her wondering, Laura’s thoughts turned once again to Carmilla. The dark haired woman was off with Lafontaine, still browsing the various shops and stalls of the market, so Laura felt as though her thoughts were safe. What would it be like to find herself falling in love with someone like Carmilla? Not Carmilla herself, obviously, but someone like her. Cold, quick-tempered, and all too holier-than-thou, it seemed like the countess’ only redeeming quality was that she valued family and was good around kids. In Laura’s eyes, that was far from enough to be even remotely appealing. She supposed that many others were attracted to the mystery of the woman, but the more said mystery was revealed to Laura, the more she realized that the shroud surrounding Carmilla wasn’t even that interesting. She turned back to admire the curve of Danny’s jaw. She was beaming, and her baby blue eyes gleamed too. Almost absentmindedly, Laura reached over to entwine her fingers with the ones resting on the rough wood of the bench. Danny responded in kind instantly. Now this was a woman Laura could love. Why look for something overcomplicated when she could have a love as lazy as a Summer evening. This was a woman Laura wanted to love. 

“So Will. What kind of books do you write,” Danny asked across the table. Laura shifted her gaze to Carmilla’s brother. He was clean shaven with high and tight dark hair, the same color as his sister’s. Evie bounced on his knee. The man had been in town for a literary conference, and stayed a couple extra days to visit with his siblings. 

“I write crime novels mostly, urban thrillers, that kind of thing,” he grinned and stroked his daughter’s blonde locks reverently before continuing, “there sure is a lot of inspiration in Turin.” That was another thing. Much like the rest of his family, Will Luce’s life was shrouded in mystery. Laura had learned little besides that he and Evie lived in Turin, and that he wrote novels. It was clear to her that the man was way less neurotic than his sisters, but there was something else. Laura couldn’t quite pinpoint it, but Will seemed sad in a way that made his docile, but it seemed like that wasn’t always the case. 

“So what’s like, living in Italy.” Like every other Karnstein, Will fascinated her to no end. He’s not technically a Karnstein, she supposed. Anyway. 

He chuckled, and his hazel eyes shone with mirth. They matched his daughter’s perfectly, “It’s nice. More relaxed. After a while, Berlin kind of felt stifling,” a pause, “as if there was not much left for me here. So Evie and I moved there when she was about one.” The youthful smile had fallen from his face. Laura was pretty sure she and him were the same age. It unsettled her. When he wasn’t so mirthful, Will’s face seemed to age years and years. She wondered if she would start to feel like that. Will’s pain, though well hidden presumably for the sake of his daughter, felt like something deeper than laura would ever know. Whatever or whoever had cursed this family was ancient and unknowable.

Nevertheless, he quickly recovered, and turned his attention once again to the bouncing mess of blonde curls, “What do you think, baby? Do you like Italy?” 

“Si! I like all the bread! Can I go play with Aunt Mattie?”

The adults at the table chuckled. To be fearless. To be careless in the best way. To be a child. 

“Go ahead,” Will said, allowing his daughter to hop off his lap. “Perry! Put the gun away!” Seeing that her lover’s niece was bounding towards her, she flashed a thumbs up towards the table and holstered the revolver into the waistband of her shorts. Will sighed and watched his daughter run off, gears visibly turning in his head. He took a moment to smooth out the short-sleeved button down he was wearing. It had a sailboat pattern. It was nice. He looked like a father. 

“Sooo... “ Laura started, searching for a topic, “where’s your wife? Is she back in Turin?” Immediately, the brunette could tell she had chosen poorly, as will sucked his teeth and ran a nervous hand through his hair, setting it free from its neat style. Laura gripped Danny’s fingers a little tighter. The man didn’t seem quick to anger like the countess, but she still feared that the resemblance went past looks. Where Carmilla’s face was sharp and angular, Will’s was broader and conveyed an air of calm. The relation, was still otherwise obvious. 

After a moment, Will sucked in a breath and faced her fully, brows slightly furrowed. His eyes betrayed nothing, “You know, I like you guys,” his fingers were drumming on the wooden table top, “My sisters and I stay in pretty good contact. I heard from Carmilla that these “insufferable Americans” had arrived in Berlin and I was like alright then because you know how she is.” He chuckled. He had a nice smile, “But then I talked to Mattie and she said something like “they’re nice, but clearly out of their element” and I was like alright then.” At this he switched his gaze to the redhead at Laura’s right, “But I’ve known you two all for about 48 hours, and I think you’ve settled very nicely into the European lifestyle.” 

“Thank you,” the two women responded in kind. Laura found it interesting that he had said this mainly to Danny. From her point of view, the older woman was always completely at ease. It was an admirable quality, as Laura felt as though she still understood nothing, much less the goings on and practices within Berlin. Maybe Danny was feeling out of place, but recognized that Laura had too many problems of her own to saddle her own insecurities on top. That night, Laura surmised. She would have an honest talk about it with her lover that night. Still, it was a little humiliating that Will had possible noticed something about the redhead that she herself had not. 

Will continued talking, “Yvonne’s mother is dead.” The phrase come out almost in a choke. 

“Oh god I’m so sorry. What was her name?” 

“Elle. Eleanor, but she went by Elle. She died shortly after childbirth, among other things.” Laura didn’t know what that meant, but obviously she wasn’t about to ask. Will’s mouth was still open, poised to say more. It almost felt as if he was desperate to spill everything, that maybe he wasn’t so put together after all and needed someone to listen. Laura found herself having to look away to avoid the intensity of his gaze. When she turned back, his eyes were drilling into the cartwheeling back of his daughter. His knuckles were white where they gripped the edge of the table. Laura wanted to implore, to beg him to just let it out as to let go of his pain. Instead, Will cleared his throat, and took a couple deep, grounding breaths. 

“I’m sorry. Please, excuse me. We shouldn’t talk about this now. This is supposed to be a good day.” Danny reached a lithe hand of comfort across the table to rest on his still too tense forearm. He tensed a second, before relaxing into the touch. 

“You know. My mother is de-”

“Laura please.” Surprisingly, the whispered chastise came from Danny, and the brunette quickly cut herself off. The air around the table was awkward now, and Laura just wanted to get up a walk away, back to the hotel, back to America. 

Thankfully, Danny changed the subject, “So how was your literary conference?”

Will also looked relieved at the change of pace, “Oh! It was great!,” and the man became animated once again, “You know I met some really great up and coming auth-” And suddenly the scene before Laura exploded into red and flesh was splattered across the table. Will’s head kicked to the side as something plump slammed into the side of his face. 

“Yes! Direct hit!”

“Carmilla oh my god!”

The subsequent shouts from the Countess and Lafontaine, respectively, were enough to almost bring Laura to her knees. She picked a piece of the substance off her no longer mint green t-shirt. It tomato. Carmilla had thrown a fast ball at the side of her brother’s skull. Will was still having trouble regaining his bearings, but his entire face and neck were covered in red, some of it dripping from the tips of his almost black hair. Carmilla and Lafontaine saddled up to the picnic table, the former sliding up next to her brother on the bench. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?! For a second I thought he had been shot!” Laura’s exclamation was only acknowledged with a brief disapproving look shot from behind a pair of wayfarers as Carmilla roughly wiped the side of her brother’s face. 

“Oh whatever,” she muttered, “like I was going to pair nearly 20 marks on some kind of heirloom organic tomato and not put it to good use.” She began laughing again at the look on Will’s face. He was not amused, but sighed anyway. “I’m getting you back for what you did to me the last time you were in town. Remember?” At this, he had the sense to look a little sheepish. 

What did he do?” said Danny, asking the question every was wondering. Everyone except for Mattie. The others had congregated around the table to join the rest of the group, and the always elegant woman just pinched the bridge of her nose at the mention of her siblings’ shenanigans. 

Carmilla turned across the table, a huge grin on her face. Laura had to admit, she had a nice smile when it was directed at something warranted. Another familial trait. “Well Clifford,” she started, earning a grumble from the redhead, “a couple months ago, Will and I went clubbing together. I was chatting up a girl and he left to get drinks. Now I myself am mostly just a social drinker,” Laura found that hard to believe, “but I digress. Me and this girl, we’re talking, and it’s going pretty good. Will comes back and hands me a drink. It’s good, tastes like coffee, and I like coffee.” At this point of the story, Carmilla clapped her brother’s back hard, “about a half hour later, me and her are on the dancefloor, just feeling it, when out of nowhere I shit my pants on the dancefloor. The boy had brought me a white russian. White russians have milk.” 

Laura couldn’t help it. She lost it. Carmilla, for what it’s worth, was an engaging storyteller. 

“Yeah, you like that, cupcake?” the countess directed at the nearly crying brunette, “whatever. We’re even now.” She good naturedly jostled her brother’s shoulder. “So what were you talking about?”

Her brother took a very obvious gulp before answering hesitantly, “Laura was just wondering about Evie’s mom.” Carmilla shot a concerned look at the brunette in question, before sliding her gaze away to the horizon. Her jaw had hardened, and Will only stared at the side of his sister’s face, an expression of worry present. For reasons not completely knows, everyone at the table was holding their breath. 

“Oh.” Still the dark haired mystery refused to meet anyone’s gaze, but after a second of contemplation, fell back hard into her normal air of indifference, “Well shall we?”

“Shall we what?”

“Do something else? There are still many things to see.” The countess gestured for everyone to rise, then pointed vaguely and Laura and Danny’s mussed and tomato stained appearances, “Do you two want to... change or something?”

Danny was quicker to answer, “Yeah I would actually.” Her tone was biting, but Carmilla remained everlastingly unphased. 

“Well maybe you’ll see something you like in the shops. Come on.” And with that, she was already walking away, gently gripping her niece's hand. Obviously, Laura didn’t have to follow her, nor did she really want to listen to the other woman’s cues. Nonetheless, she was still wary of where they stood, and in favor of not rocking the boat any more than necessary, silently followed. She was grumpy about it, but Laura followed, Danny scoffing next to her in annoyance. 

The group had been strolling leisurely around the city center for sometimes, and Laura found herself falling back into step with Lafontaine. Danny was engaged in animated conversation with Perry and Mattie. Will and Carmilla continued to playfully rib each other, Evie stationed firmly on her aunt’s back. Laura was struck by the difference in dynamic between Carmilla and her two siblings. It was clear that Carmilla and Mattie loved each other, but their relationship seemed more formal than that of the countess and her brother. Although Mattie had her moments of mirth and was an all-around good-natured person, it seemed like the formality she displayed with her chosen profession sometimes seeped into her personal relationships to the point where she sometimes felt more like Carmilla’s attorney than her sister. Laura liked Matska Belmonde, and hoped that one day she could consider her a friend. It was obviously, however, that the only person who would ever really get her was Perry.

On the other hand was the dynamic between Carmilla and Will. It seemed from Laura’s perspective to be a much more traditional sibling relationship. From what little information she knew about this family, Carmilla and her brother were closer in age than she was to her sister, but not by much. She had been told once that all three siblings had the same mother, but different fathers, so the countess and Will were still half-siblings, not that the specifics were significant. Laura figured that maybe Will’s distance contributed to their more playful raport. In a way, maybe they were trying to make up for lost time in between visits. Still, Laura suspected something deeper and more melancholy went on between the two of them. It was the look Will gave to Carmilla at the mention of Elle. Whatever happened will the mysterious woman, there was more than one sibling involved. 

Laura turned to Lafontaine, “How long have you known Will?” 

“About two years. Same time Perry did. Of course, we’d been hearing about him since Perry and Mattie got together, it was like we practically knew the guy already. He had a literary event in London, and Mattie came along to introduce him to Lola. I tagged along.” Laf laughed slightly dejectedly at their last comment. Laura wondered what that was about, but she was focusing on Will at the moment.

She leaned in closer to the Londoner to avoid being heard, “Is Will, like, ok?”

It was the first time Laura had seen her companion completely stone-faced. “Would you be ok if you became a single parent at 17?” They didn’t wait for Laura to answer, “No I suppose not.” The brunettes merely nodded and sucked on her lower lip, presuming the conversation was over. Laf, however, had more to say, “Look. I know you were an investigative journalism major of whatever, and it’s natural for you to be curious. I mean,” they gestured between the siblings, “how could you not be? They’re fascinating. But I’m really not the person to ask about this. You’d have to talk to Will or Carmilla, and since Will is going back to Turin tomorrow, you’d have to talk to Carmilla. Nor can I really stop you, but like I said, I don’t know everything. I only know what was told to me by Perry, and she didn’t tell me much. But I know enough that Elle is a forbidden subject.”

“I understand. But is there anything else you can tell me?” 

Lafontaine sighed in resignation, “Fine. You know how Carmilla has tattoos all up the insides of both her forearms.” Laura nodded. She had seen that they were there, but unlike some of the countesses’ other tattoos, they were more difficult to study. Laf continued, looking Laura right in the eyes, “Not all of her tattoos are purely decorative. Let’s talk about something else.” The brunette was thrown but Lafontaine’s abruptness and took a moment to process what was actually said. She doubted Carmilla would allow her access to her arms anytime soon, so she didn’t think she would ever get the chance to inspect further into the redhead’s claims.

Laura thought back to Lafontaine’s self-pitying laugh from a few moments prior and decided to focus on that, “So how did you and Perry meet?

At that, Laf’s face lit up in a smile that Laura had grown accustomed to, “We met at a uni football match our freshman years. I was at King’s, she was at St. Andrews. Scotland won and to this day I haven’t heard the end of it.” Again, they chuckled reverently before continuing, “We met in the stands and immediately hit it off. That Summer and every Summer during uni we lived together in London. We’re always going to be best mates.” 

“Doesn’t Perry have family?”

“Oh yeah!” they exclaimed, “She’s got four younger brothers. So her plus her mum and dad makes seven. Lola’s from the shetlands, so it was hard for her to go back and forth, especially in college. Plus,” Laf’s face downturned again, “Perry isn’t a small town type of girl. She loves London, and London loves her back.” They hesitated again, this time with a pained look in their eyes, “I guess Berlin loves her a lot these days too…”

Laura rubbed Lafontaine’s back in comfort. It was hard seeing one’s best friend get into a relationship. From what she could gather, Perry and Mattie had been together for quite some time. She wondered how long the Londoner had felt that way, “Laf, is Mattie not good to Perry?”

Laf blanched, looking slightly ill and guilty, “No of course not. Believe me when I say that they are meant to be together. It’s just, difficult sometimes.” They paused, and Laura allowed time the redhead to gather their thoughts. “I’ll admit, there was a time, maybe still is, that I had a crush on Lola. But now, when I look at them, and I look at that ring on her finger, I’m just really happy that she’s happy. Mattie makes her so happy.”

Finally, Laura might get an answer to another one of her questions, “Have they always been like that?” Even now, as the group was walking, Mattie pulled her lover close to her and planted a kiss on Perry’s temple, causing the redhead to beam. 

Lafontaine also gazed at the happy couple, “No.” This was thrilling to Laura, as one of her speculations was finally being explored. She gestured for her friend to continue, “You really gotta hear Mattie tell the story of the night they met. It’s a good one. But anyway, around the same time the two of them met, things were going down back in Germany with Will and Elle. Carmilla was in America on the exact date Perry and Mattie met, but came home soon afterward on holiday. The situation at home was tense and although it was completely divorced from Perry, it put a strain on Mattie, which in turn strained their fledgling relationship. Mattie herself wasn’t even directly involved, but still.”

They were again back to Elle. The dark horse overlayed and dyed each of the siblings in one way or another. Still, Laura had to know more, “But they got through it?”

“Oh yeah. Like I said, Perry doesn’t fit in in the Shetlands, and her relationship with her family is strained. Mattie obviously had a fairly convoluted family tree, so they’ve really been able to connect on that. My parents are my best friends, so Mattie understand Perry on a level I was never able to. By the way, Another great story, and one I don’t want to give too much away, but Perry and Mattie got engaged shortly after Evie was born.” 

“It’s a beautiful ring.”

“It’s a Tiffany setting.”

“Damn.”

“Yeah.” 

Lafontaine smiled ruefully, “I remember the day she came home with it. We were living in some crap place in Lambeth at the time, and at, like, three in the morning, Perry came tearing into my room, crying and yelling about how she and Mattie were going to get married. My stomach dropped at that and dropped even lower when I saw the ring. I was so happy for her, but a big part of me still wanted to have been the one to give it to her.” Their voice was starting to get a little thick and their accent raised in prominence too. Laura continued to rub soothingly on Laf’s forearm. “I remember bein’ like, what do ya mean? You’re only 21. But Perry didn’t care. Still doesn’t. That was 5 years ago as of about a week ago. The first place that allows them to get married, the two of them are there, be it Liverpool or Timbuktu.” 

Lafontaine sighed and smiled lightly at Laura, “Perry moved out shortly after they got engaged. She keeps a place in Notting Hill, but the two of them split their time between there and here. But Perry told me awhile ago that she’s been wanting to live full time back in England again, so I think that she’s working to convince Mattie to do so.” 

Laura smiled reassuringly, “That would be great. You’d certainly get to see her more.”

“Yeah.” Laura could tell that this was another conversation that was over. They had been walking for awhile, just ambling around the city. They found themselves in the area of Carmilla’s neighborhood. Laura had never really taken the time to really observe the surroundings. Poplars and fir trees lined the boulevard. There were many local shops. Conversations floated out from their open doors. It was an inviting area. There were lots of public park areas and it was obvious that the city was diligent in terms of municipal upkeep. 

Off in the distance, a jogger approached on the other side of the street. He was wearing a black adidas tracksuit, and as the man grew closer, Laura realized that it was the smuggler Kirsch. It also became apparent that he was running towards them. His hair was even more disheveled than the first time they had met. His curly hair hung wet around his face and the skin around his mustache was dark with a five o’ clock shadow. 

“Carmilla!” He yelled, quickly approaching. Kirsch looked incredibly tired. He had a little bit of a pot belly, and Laura wondered how often he got out of his house, much less across the wall. 

“Carmilla!” He yelled again and came to a panting stop in front of the countess. Their group had finally made their way back to her apartment. The rental car was parked outside, as well as Perry’s bike. The brownstone was enough of a landmark that it had been their starting location for the day. It was also well established that if one were to include Carmilla, it was much easier to go to her than to make her meet people somewhere else. 

“Carmilla!”

“What?! Jesus Kirsch did you run here?!”

“No,” he wheezed. The man was bent at the waist with his hands resting on his knees. A handwritten note was firmly clutched in his fist, “my car broke down right when I got through the checkpoint. I just left it there. This is more important.” He handed the document to Carmilla. He turned to Laura and Danny, “Hey Mädchen.” Kirsch winked, but in his current state it came off as more of a wince. 

Carmilla took off her sunglasses, tucking them into the breast pocket of her shirt. Her eyes widened and quickly flickered between the page, to Kirsch, and back again. “Everybody get inside,” she said and opened the door to her brownstone as quickly as possible. 

The group congregated in the cluttered dining room. Evie ran upstairs and the sound of the TV could be heard. Carmilla smacked the page on the dining table, the paper damp from Kirsch’s sweat. She rounded on the man, who was finally beginning to gain back his breathe, “who gave you this?” 

He shrugged in response, “I don't know. There I was, minding my own business in my own apartment. I was doing a…quality check…on some of the merchandise I got in, when I was interrupted by this piece of paper being shoved under my door. Anyway, I believe it.” By the end of the tale, Kirsch was wide-eyes, as was Carmilla. 

“Read this,” she said, shoving the paper in Danny’s hands. 

In large, black and messy scrawl “GALA SUNDAY. LOWERED SECURITY. MAY BE LAST CHANCE TO SEE HIM ALIVE.” The page was passed around the group. 

“Why wasn't this brought here?” Laura questioned.

“The right people must know I'm one of Carmilla’s contacts. It would probably be too difficult for whoever gave me this to get across the wall. Carm, I believe this,” Kirsch explained. The countess nodded, thinking for a moment. 

“Alright. Al-right. Ok everyone. We’re getting Theo in two days.”

A chorus of “what” and “oh my god” chimed from around the room. The countess only rolled her eyes. She struck a match and popped a cigarette into her mouth. The tap of her shoes on the hardwood betrayed her skittishness at the situation. 

“I am in charge of this mission. So I say we’re going on Sunday. Here is what we will do.” Grumbles and groans filled the space, but everyone ultimately resigned themselves to the urgency of the hour. She continued, “Lafontaine, you and Mattie will run the mission from The Black Cat. I assume you all have the Walkie talkies I gave you?” They did. Carmilla had gifted military grade walkie talkies to the group a couple weeks ago. “Kirsch, you and Lawrence will head in first and secure the location. I'm pretty sure they're keeping Will in a warehouse, so there'll probably be quite a bit of space to cover. I will…prowl…the area around outside the building.” She nervously fiddled with her sunglasses. A nervous Carmilla made Laura nervous. For someone so jaded, whatever was bothering her should clearly also be a cause for alarm for the others.

“And Ms. Hollis,” she started, then took a long drag from the cigarette, “I need you to follow in second and actually get Theo out of there. Now he's presumably in pretty bad shape so be care-”

“WHAT.” The exclamation, surprisingly came not from Laura, but from Danny. The dark haired woman was seemingly caught off guard.

“...what…? 

Danny was getting up into her face now, which probably wasn't a good idea, “That's way too dangerous for her! She's not experienced enough.” 

Carmilla quickly recovered, “How is she supposed to gain experience if she doesn't do anything?” 

“Why can't you do it? All you've assigned yourself is skulking around the alley. You go in and get him. Trade with Laura.”

“Oh as if Laura has experience canvassing an entire city block,” came the rebuttal. Danny opened her mouth once more to protest, but before she could, “Question me again and I will report you. Stop, Danny. Laura,” she turned to Laura, “you're doing this. Anyway Perry, drive the getaway car.”

Tension still hung in the air. Danny still stood stock still inches from the countess’ face, who held the redhead’s gaze unwaveringly. 

“Get out of my house.” 

“Gladly,” Danny replied. She turned on her heel and made her way towards the door. Laura made to follow but was suddenly pulled backwards. “Trust me” was hotly whispered against her ear and just like that, she was released and following Danny to the car. As much as she didn't want to, it seemed like Laura’s only option was to trust Carmilla. It wasn't a pleasant feeling. 

The car ride back to The Black Cat was stiff and silent. The radio served as little more than pure background noise. 

“I can't believe she's making you do that,” Danny ground out from her place in the driver’s seat. When Laura didn't immediately respond, she glanced over to find her companion with her arms crossed and her brow furrowed. 

“Why do you think I can't complete an extraction?” Laura questioned, surprisingly accusatory. Danny picked up on her tone immediately. 

“God Laura it's not that I don't think you can't, it’s just that I worried because you haven't before.” 

The brunette continued to sit in contemplation. Frustration was beginning to simmer within her veins.

“Are you scared?” 

“Of course I'm scared,” Laura snapped, “but I am a CIA operative, and I will get over it.” She wished it would have kept storming. The thunder and rainfall served as a dampener for her thoughts. Now the summer sun forced her to confront them. 

“I don't know why you're taking this out on me.” This comment only fueled Laura’s fire. She sharpest turned in her seat and allowed ear eyes to bore into the side of Danny’s face. 

“Are you feeling insecure? Like are you feeling out of place here?” 

Danny looked nervous. Her bottom lip was captured by her teeth, “I don't really want to have this conversation in the car…” 

“Too bad.” 

“Fine,” the redhead said resolutely. Her demeanor was turning more testy to match her lover’s, “Yes I'm insecure. This entire city just makes me feel like a fish out of water. I feel like I'm trying really hard to keep you safe from everything but I just can't because there's too much.”

“Danny, that isn't your job. I don't need you to keep me safe. I already have a dad,” Laura replied. Her voice was icy, but the brunette could feel her face heating up. 

“Yeah well I love you so you just need to deal with it,” the taller of the two rushed out. That remark completely caught Laura off guard and she completely deflated. The anger within her gave way to fear at the sudden realization that she couldn't truthfully return the sentiment, at least not yet. She knew it was cruel, but the best course of action right then was to stay silent and hope for Death. They had been together for barely a month. Yes, it was true that Laura had deep feelings for the other woman, but to say love would at this point was untrue. There was too much else going on to truly delve into the true depth of how she felt. Thus, Laura stayed silent. A softly muttered and resigned “ok” came from the direction of the driver’s seat. 

By the time the two of them returned to the hotel, it was still the middle of the afternoon. Danny elected to stay upstairs for a while, while Laura lingered in the lounges of the first floor, once again acquiring a newspaper from down the street. It was then that she truly observed the gravity of her situation. In two days time, she herself was going to be the one responsible for dragging Theo out of the pits of hell af back into the light. She wondered what state he’d be in. Danny was bound to attempt to assist, and although Laura knew she would most likely accept the help, the Laura that currently sat in a plush armchair wished that she wouldn't. Only time would tell. 

She also suspected that Carmilla would also be more useful than Danny gave her credit for. Danny. Laura’s thoughts derailed as she thought back to what had been said in the car. Danny loved her, and Laura hadn't been able to say it back. In desperation, she hoped that one day she'd be able to, but found that said desperation wasn't clawing so resolutely at her as it once had been. Were Laura’s feelings for the redhead falling out of reach? She hoped not. Maybe it was just taking her longer to discover the depth of said feelings. That was a better explanation. It held more of a promise than the former. 

She finally attempted to shift her focus to the newspaper in front of her, but Laura couldn't help but think of Carmilla’s request for trust. Even more surprisingly, was the brunette's ability to give it so freely. Her conversations will both Will and Lafontaine had shed minimal light on the situation, while also raising even more questions than before. Laura felt more determined than ever to obtain the answers. 

She finally settled back into the chair and began to read. Interesting. The front page detailed Ronald Reagan’s upcoming visit to Berlin. Fantastic. Maybe they could get him to complete the extraction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from Iggy Pop's "The Passenger". 
> 
> Thanks again for all the engagement. I love hearing from you guys!


	8. Hear My Words That I Might Teach You (Take My Arms That I Might Reach You)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Like oops. I have only apologies. I never meant for it to take this long. I really really think that after I get through this chapter I’ll be better because to be honest it’s not like I’ve been dreading writing this chapter, but most of my ideas are set into motion by this chapter and I’m like ugh this is going to be a slog to write. But, on the bright side, after this one, I’ll really start to get into the meat of it. So yeah. Again, so sorry for the unexpected hiatus. But now I have a new computer, and a sudden urge to write. So away we go!
> 
> I updated this on 5/3/20. The ending has been reworked. 
> 
> TW for suicide.

Laura’s fingers traced the knots in the wooden desk of her room at The Black Cat. The pale pink plastic phone hung precariously between her chin and shoulder. Her other hand rubbed nervously at her knees. Danny sat on the bed behind, staring lazily at what seemed to be a public access channel, but in reality, Laura had no idea what it was. She was kidding herself if those language tapes she had been listening to had made any kind of lasting impact. 

It was around 7:00 Sunday morning. In four short hours the two Americans would be meeting at Silas’ to do a quick runthrough and briefing before departing for the extraction: Laura’s first ever real-world mission. 

“I’m sorry Mattie, I didn’t quite get that,” Laura said into the receiver. She annoyedly swiveled around in the cracked leather chair and snapped at Danny, indicating for her to turn the volume down on the television. Since the incident in the car two days prior, Laura had allowed things to settle to about as normal as possible. Having to deal with angst in their fledgling relationship compounded with every other goddamn thing was just too much. Thus, when the two women awoke Saturday morning, an unvoiced consensus was agreed upon to just... let things relax between the two of them and try to forget what happened in the car. And so far, though it had only been a day, that mindset worked. Although in the current moment, she was trying to get work done, Laura found herself smiling at the mere thought of Danny when she turned back around. But it was time to get work done. Love would have to wait just a little longer. 

“I said the gala referenced in the note is probably some foundation thing. A lot of big wigs there and stuff. Government people. Other prominent figures in Berlin.”

“Ok, but what does that have to do with the decreased security at the warehouse?” Laura questioned.

“Well,” Mattie began, “We never figured out who exactly had captured Theo, but Carmilla had a theory and I suppose she’s probably right.” 

Laura rolled her eyes at this, “Yeah I’m sure she does.” The brunette sighed and placed her hands flat on the desk, “Alright let’s hear it.”

“So Carmilla thinks he was captured by the mob.”

“Wait what-”

“Let me finish,” Matska chided, “she thinks it’s probably the mob working in collusion with the KGB. She thinks the gala is being thrown by someone in the upper echelons of the Berlin underground. Her theory is that extra security is needed at the party, so some of the guards from the warehouse were reassigned for the night. Someone or multiple someones are probably worried about assassination.”

Laura scrunched up her nose and huffed. “That... is actually a pretty good theory,” she reluctantly replied.

“There’s just one problem. Well, I mean it’s not a problem now, but it might become one in the future.”

“...what…”

Mattie hesitated for a moment, “If Carmilla’s theory is correct, which we seem to both agree it probably is, we still have no idea which racket is holding Theo. And I’m sure we’re going to find out later today, but it would be nice to know beforehand.” 

Laura made a sound of acknowledgement in response. The TV shut off behind her and a pair of arms snaked around Laura’s neck while Danny’s mouth descended on hers. She kissed the redhead back passionately. Despite the slight awkwardness between them, the shorter woman couldn’t deny herself the pleasure of reveling in the physicality of her lover. It was simple to Laura. Not that an emotional connection between lovers wasn’t equally as important, but there was something about being touched, being kissed, that Laura was an absolute sucker for. They continued on in that way for a few moments, completely consumed in each other when a clearly uncomfortable Mattie laughed lightly on the other land. 

“Two young lovers. I wish you every happiness,” she said. Laura immediately snapped to her senses and pushed Danny away. Laura herself was quickly turning the color of her lover’s hair. 

“Mattie oh my god I’m sorry, I don’t know what got into me,” she sputtered, attempting to regain control of her breathing as well as her general bearings.

“Laura it’s fine. I’m just going to leave you to it,” and then there was a click on the other line. Laura turned to Danny, her face still aflame. There was something almost gratifying about the way the redhead grinned back at her: all too cheeky. 

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

Laura chose her next words with great care. The smile on her lover’s face had ignited something within her. Lust the feeling was not, but guilt and embarrassment.

“I’ve been...distant,” Laura stood from the chair, “this past little while.” She sat down next to Danny on the bed. She rubbed the redhead’s arm with fondness and gave a bashful and wry smile. 

“You keep trying to reach out to me, to drag me back from the soul-sucking feeling of resignation that, quite frankly, permeates this city and the people in it, and in return, I’ve been cold.”

The redhead tucked a strand of her honey locks behind her ear and drew the other woman into her side. 

“I still care you know. I never stopped caring.”

“I know.” 

Laura allowed her cheek to squish into the strong chest, “I’d understand if you were mad at me.”

A gentle hand moved through brunette hair. “Angry...no. I don’t have the energy to be angry at you. I don’t really have the energy to harbor anger towards anyone.”

This made Laura quirk and eyebrow, “What about Carmilla?”

Danny chuckled slightly and playfully tugged on the other woman’s hair, “If I said I don’t get angry with her would you believe me?” Laura’s head nodded against the other’s chest. “Well I don’t. Exasperated, absolutely, but the way I see it, if I get angry with Carmilla, then I’m validating her behavior and confirming that she’s getting under my skin.” She paused for a moment in thought before continuing, “But I thought we were talking about you.”

Laura tracced patterns on the bare skin of Danny’s forearm: a heart, a star, a shamrock, “I suppose we were”

“I mean I’m not angry with you. I’m just confused.” 

At that, the brunette huffed out a breath through her nose, recognizing the familiarity of the situation, “You sound like my dad. I don’t need another parent.”

“Laura if we’re going to have a successful relationship then you need to realize that I’m not trying to be your parent. Implying that your dad is the only person who has the right to protect you is incredibly hurtful to me, and to anyone else that is invested in your safety and overall wants you to succeed.” Laura, being a little thrown but the other woman’s sudden serious tone, opened her mouth to reply, but Danny wasn’t done.  
“So yes. I’m trying to protect you Please just allow yourself to accept my help. I don’t want to be your rock, I want to be someone you can depend on, and if you want the same, being emotionally distant isn’t going to get us anywhere.” 

Laura turned to face Danny completely. A beat of silence passed between them. It was heavy with contemplation.

“I accept you,” she whispered before leaning into a kiss. 

Later, the time drew nigh. The cavalry was on its way. Between Carmilla’s junker and Perry’s bike, Laura, Danny, Kirsch, Lola, and the aforementioned Countess made their way across the wall. It was late afternoon. Still bright enough to see without headlights, but not so bright as to completely give away their identities. Laura and Danny sat in the backseat of Carmilla’s car. The brunette’s left hand clung to her lover’s. The right, on the other hand, tapped a nervous pattern and the inside of the door. 

“Laura please. It’s time for silent reflection. Your tapping is distracting,” chastised the driver. She did stop and she did reflect. It was not the first time Laura had mulled over the possibility of her death via this mission. She had been assured, but multiple people in fact, that true, it’s a possibility, but a pretty minor one. That reassurance had a negligible effect of her anxiety. The fact that Laura was even in this position in the first place was ultimately her fault anyway. It’s not like she was forced into a career at the CIA, though considering her background in journalism, it wasn’t exactly something she would have predicted either. 

It was her junior year in college when the thought first entered into her mind. She had interned at local papers and news stations and Laura became more and more disgusted by the apparent “boy’s clubs” many of those places turned out to be. 

“Well you can’t really be surprised, can you?” had been her father’s insightful response. All her friends were saying to just tough it out; things would get better with time. 

Then, one night, Laura had found herself sloppy drunk at a gay bar in the East Village at 6pm on a Tuesday. She had spilled basically her entire sob story to the bartender, and, in what most likely a hail-Mary attempt to get her to shut up, the man behind the counter said, “What if you just like, fuck around and join the CIA?”

“What?”

“Yeah,” he continued polishing the glasses, “why not just do something completely out of left field? I mean you have to have discretion sometimes in journalism right?” Laura could only nod, transfixed by the idea. 

“What if I just fucked around and joined the CIA?” Thus, Laura fucked around and joined the CIA. Did she ever think she would be in a situation like this? The CIA is deep and unknowable. To attempt to understand their motives is like attempting to catch smoke with one’s bare hands. 

“And ye shall know the truth, and the truth will set you free. We have arrived,” Carmilla announced. Her deep eyes met Laura’s in the rear view.

“How did you-” Laura was rooted to the back seat, stunned and mouth and eyes wide. It was almost like Carmilla could read her mind.

“It’s your first mission, yes?” She didn’t wait for a response, “It’s not hard to guess that you might be thinking about your origin story.” The Countess winked. Laura didn’t like it. Everyday it got harder and harder to read the German spy. Did Carmilla like her? It seemed like she was at least tolerated. An upgrade from pest, Laura supposed. 

“Everybody check your walkies, your firearms, your underwear, or whatever the hell else. We move in 5 minutes.” 

Laura did as she was told. Her walkie was working as was her side-arm. Her pants weren’t in threat of falling down so with 3 minutes to go she observed the others to take her mind off herself. Perry inspected her bike. Kirsch did jumping jacks and stretched. His tracksuit was a tasteful light grey, curls barely held back by the headband. Laura’s focus fell on Carmilla. She expected her to be taking a deep drag of a cigarette, but what she found instead surprised her. Laura knew that when out and about, Carmilla kept a pack of smokes rolled up in her sleeve like some kind of greaser, but the brunette had also noticed something else tucked up the Countess’ other sleeve. Laura couldn’t help but move closer out of intrigue.

“If you want to know so bad come here.” Damn. Diligence was just one of many characteristics Carmilla shared with her furry friends. 

“Laura come here. Seriously.” And Laura did. The gold cross was sitting comfortably on Carmilla’s chest. Everytime Laura saw it on her, the shock lessened a little more. 

“Face me.” And Laura did. 

The Countess revealed a small vial of holy water from her right sleeve.

“I’m going to touch your face now. Don’t flinch.” And Laura didn’t as Carmilla anointed her and then did the same to herself. Carmilla’s fingers were calloused and rough on Laura’s face. It was an arresting sensation, but not really one Laura could say she didn’t enjoy. The way neither the Countess' voice nor face nor hands shook at all was a comfort but Laura still wondered. Does Carmilla want to die, or has she been doing this long enough that acceptance of such an event came naturally to her. The brunette wondered if she would ever get to that place, if she would live long enough to be ok with not living. 

The smooth, sultry voice brought Laura back to the present as did the calloused hands slipping to hold hers. 

“Through this holy anointing may the Lord in his love and mercy help you with the grace of the Holy Spirit. May the Lord who frees you from sin save you and raise you up,” she swallowed a little before continuing, “Our father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name…” 

Laura loathed Carmilla. She loathed the fact that the bitch was currently reading her last rites and all she wanted to do was lean in and place her head on the other woman’s chest to hear her voice up close because damn. Carmilla could read aloud a phonebook and she would hang on every word. She loathed the fact that she involuntarily squeezed the hands that were holding hers. She didn’t like Carmilla. She really, truly, absolutely didn’t like Carmilla, but loathed how now that was starting to feel like a mistake. The thing was, though, as evidenced by the cross boring into Laura’s soul not a foot away, nothing about Carmilla was a mistake.

“Amen.” 

“...amen,” Laura said breathlessly, the seldomly used word feeling like a thorn in her mouth. Her hands were dropped. How long had they been like that? It couldn’t have been more than a minute but it felt like an entire era had passed. 

So maybe Danny couldn’t always read people very well, because when she turned Laura’s head and leaned in, she quickly leaned out due to the shock evident in the brunette’s eyes. 

“Whoa maybe no good luck kiss then. You good?” the redhead whispered, leaning her forehead against her lover’s.

“Y-yeah,” was Laura’s weak response. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Carmilla grinding the toe of her boot into the gravel. “Yeah I’m just nervous,” Laura felt a little of her confidence return, “It’s uh, kind of my first time.” She smirked, and the mirth returned to Danny’s eyes.

“Oh we got ourselves a virgin. Don’t worry, I’ll go nice and slow,” the taller of the two replied, really laying it on thick. This time when she leaned in, their lips met in the middle in a pretty steamy kiss. Now Laura was never one to open her eyes during a kiss, but something came over her. She saw Carmilla to Danny’s left and The Countess looked like she could spit. Good. Laura didn’t want to feel like she owed the other woman something, what that would even be, however, was a mystery to even the gods. The two separated with a pop and the grin on Danny’s face couldn’t be wiped off by the atomic bomb. 

Laura watched as Carmilla struggled to find something to say, an incredibly uncomfortable look on her face. 

“It’s time to go,” is what she eventually settled on, clapping a hand on Danny’s shoulder, “You ready?” Perry made her way over to the bike. The low rumble started up and Laura realized that she would soon be alone. 

“Yes.”

“And you?” She cocked her head at Kirsch. He nodded in cold confidence. “Then off you go.” And with that, the two of them ran into the warehouse busting down the door. Laura turned away. She didn’t have it in her to look before it was her turn to move in. In doing this, she also realized that although it was only seconds later, Carmilla was gone, as was her car.

“I’m nearby. Try not to hyperventilate,” said a cool voice over the headset in Laura’s ear. At this point, she was convinced that Carmilla actually could read minds. Nonetheless, she was calmed slightly especially when Mattie and Laf chimed in that everything seemed to be going even smoother than anticipated. That was good, the brunette surmised. Then again, it was strange that she could see Danny and Kirsch moving through the windows of the warehouse, but she hadn’t heard even one gunshot. 

That thought was cut off by Kirsch’s thick accent over the walkie, “We found Theo.”

“Great job. Laura, move in,” Mattie calmly said from back at mission control. 

Laura heard her, really, she did, but suddenly the city streets and hot night seemed all that suffocating. 

“Laura. GO,” Mattie reiterated, sounding a little annoyed. Suddenly a hand was at the small of her back shoving Laura to the entrance. The stranger was gone before she could even turn around to see who it was. Taking a deep breath, she steeled herself and drew her sidearm. Laura moved into the warehouse. 

That sultry voice was back, “there we go. Just needed a little push is all.” Now Laura didn't have time to unpack tha, but in a way she was grateful Carmilla had done that. It would have been an incredible failure on her part to just crash and burn on her very first mission.

The interior looked like, well, a warehouse. There were lots of crates covered in canvas tarps. Palettes littered the floor. Laura also realized the reason this was going way easier than expected. The place was completely devoid of people. There was absolutely no resistance. If Laura wasn’t overcome with relief, she’d be nervous about it. 

“Laura up here,” Danny shouted from the second floor. The brunette took the stairs two at a time and came to the door of the warehouse manager’s office. Inside was a grim scene, Danny and Kirsch knelt beside Theo, who looked near death. He was limp and pale. Dark hair was matted to his forehead. Robes bound his wrists and ankles and a blindfold was secured over his eyes. Dried blood had settled under his nose. Laura couldn’t be sure, but it looked broken. She sprung into action, cutting him free. The blindfold was removed and two black eyes were revealed. Laura sucked a breathe in through her teeth at the sight. She couldn’t even imagine what this man had been through. 

Hoisting his arm over her shoulder, the party made their way down the stairs and out the warehouse. Danny and Kirsch flanked her left and right sides, firearms at the ready. 

“We’re coming out,” Danny said into the walkie. 

“Affirmative. Perry, Carmilla, make your way back. Danny, you ride on the bike with Lola. Laura, you take Theo back in Carmilla’s car. Kirsch you can...go home I guess,” came Mattie’s response. Laura forgot that Kirsch lived on this side of the wall. Lucky him how he could just go home. The man slunk away, leaving only Danny protecting Laura and the injured man. 

Suddenly, a shot rang out and landed about a foot in front of Laura. There was a moment of silence, and then all hell broke loose. The rooftops exploded and gunfire practically rained down onto the alley. Danny was shooting, Laura was screaming, everything was collapsing. Theo was growing heavier in Laura arms with each passing moment. She was pulled behind a dumpster by the redhead. The plink of bullets continued on the walls around them and on the other side of the dumpster. 

“Mattie, Lafontaine, things have gone south,” Danny practically screamed into her headset. 

“What do you mean?”

“What I mean is that this totally was a setup! We’re drowning in heavy fire here!”

“Oh great…” 

Just then, a familiar rumble broke the monotony of gunfire. Never before had a motorcycle sounded like angels, but when Lola Perry rolled up on her bike, it felt like the second coming. She weaved and dodged like a weasel, the bike truly an extension of her body.

“Laura I have to leave you now.”

“WHAT?” 

“Laura I have to go with Perry,” Danny reiterated, “I’m sorry. Carmilla will be here soon.” Before she could stop her, Danny wrenched herself out of Laura’s white-knuckeled grasp, and made a run for it, shooting off a couple bullets in the process. It was interesting because it seemed that once the shooters on the roof realized who it was, the rain of gunfire let up a bit. This was also terrifying because it also confirmed that Theo, and by extension, Laura, was the real prize. 

Laura watched, all the light draining from her face as Danny seamlessly hopped onto Perry’s bike as it drove by. She was alone. She was hiding behind a dumpster with a nearly-dead man, but other than him she was alone. A bout of clarity came over her. This isn’t how Laura Hollis was meant to go out. 

Before she had another second to think about it, the weight in her arms began to move. It was Theo, he was awakening. His hands moved to Laura’s, and she realized he was reaching for her armed hand. He weakly grasped for the gun in Laura’s trembling fist. 

“Theo I’m thrilled you’re awake, but you’re in no state to shoot.” 

“Just try and stop me,” he retorted before mustering a surprising amount of strength. The gun was ripped from the brunette's hands. The plink of gunfire on pavement carried on around the two of them from their refuge behind the dumpster. Out of the coroner of her eye, Laura saw a shadow leave from from across the alley. 

Theo was still basically being cradled by Laura. 

His last words were, “they took my cyanide capsule.” 

The American’s eyes widened but she had no chance in stopping him. 

“WAIT THEO NO!”

In a second, the British agent pointed the gun under his chin and fired. Blood and brain matter were immediately spattered onto Laura and the surrounding area. The growing pool of blood was being partially absorbed by her clothes. 

All air and noise left the world, and it was starting to go black around the edges too. The shadow rematerialized a few meters away. As it quickly approached, she was certain it was the grim reaper taking mercy on both of them. One could only be so lucky. 

“LAURA!”

For the second time that night, Laura was shoved away. The force caused her to stumble, dropping the now corpse of Theo. 

Laura couldn’t move. Her eyes stayed rooted on the body of the man she was supposed to save. 

“Laura we have to run.” It amazed Laura how Carmilla’s voice never waivered, now or ever, though she did sound a little out of breathe. 

She couldn’t, “I can’t leave him.” 

“Cupcake you have to.” 

“I can’t.” 

A hand grabbed her upper arm. “You have to come with me.” Carmilla had probably yelled it over the cacophony of gunfire, but to Laura, her voice resonated as the only sound in the world.” She let herself go, and was reluctantly dragged away out of danger. 

Running now, the American spotted The Countesses’ junker idling at the end of a narrow alleyway. The back door was already open, so using the last of her strength, hurled herself onto the back bench of the car. Carmilla slammed her door and hopped in the driver’s seat. They were finally done. They were finally going back. 

At that moment, Laura Hollis’ mind was processing only three things:  
Carmilla could not stop nervously glancing at her via the rear view mirror.  
Laura’s hands and most of her upper body were covered in someone else’s blood.  
That someone was Theo, and his dead eyes glared holes in the sky from the alley where he took his last breathe 

“I need to pull over for a smoke,” the driver said. Her voice coming off as unnaturally clipped. Laura hadn’t even noticed, but it seemed as though they were taking the scenic route back. Carmilla pulled them over next to a wheat field. The lights of the city were still visible, but it was much more peaceful here. 

Laura remained rooted to her spot. Her eyes flipped between her hands, Theo, and the chain smoking German who was currently pacing up and down the road. She wondered if there were any other blood stains on the interior of the car. It wouldn’t be surprising. Just then, the brunette was awoken from her fugue state but a harsh tapping on the window and the most livid face Carmilla could muster. She gestured for Laura to come outside, and not wanting to force Carmila to come inside, she complied. 

The Countess continued to smoke, but had stopped pacing. Instead, she leveled Laura with the most vengeful glare the world had ever seen. 

“Badly done, Laura,” she finally spat out, “Badly done indeed.” 

“...what…?”

The other woman scoffed, “Oh please. Why did you freeze up like that? Were you trying to get killed,” Laura was steamrolled before even having the chance to respond, “Were you trying to get Theo killed? Well you did get Theo killed. And fine. We were obviously set up. But you should have done at least something. That was the plan. You directly defied a commanding officer. I should report you. I should tell MI6 exactly what happened and throw you under the bus because it is your fault their man is dead. So are you happy? Get back in the fucking car.” She snuffed out her last cigarette and made her way back to the driver’s seat. Laura simply did as she was told. The rest of the ride home was spent in silence. 

The junker pulled up to The Black Cat. She didn’t even have to be asked, Laura just exited the car. But before trudging up to her room, she went around to the driver’s seat and tapped for Carmille to roll down the window. It descended to reveal Carmilla at her most unamused.

“He took my gun, Carmilla.” For a split second, the countess’ face betrayed her and shock and guilt were evident upon her features. The two of them stared into each other’s eyes for a long moment. Laura was determined not to look away first. The window was rolled back up between them. Laura got the message. She went inside. 

Part of her knew the other woman was right in some way. She had completely frozen up after all. Perhaps Theo had realized that Laura wasn’t going to do anything for him and took matters into his own hands. 

Laura finally made her way to the bathroom and stripped off her bloodstained clothes. The bathtub was soon filled. The last thing Laura Hollis did that night was sob as the clear water was tinged pink with blood. Carmilla was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from Simon and Garfunkel's "Sound of Silence"
> 
> Again comment and likes are always appreciated.


	9. But She Hears Only Whispers of Some Quiet Conversation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I lied, Danny is briefly in this chapter. 
> 
> Sorry for the delay in updating. But hey, at least it's not six months this time.
> 
> Also, If you're into Gravity Falls, I just started a new fanfic. It's called "The Unfamiliar Taste of Sunlight". It's a Mabifica high school AU, and the second chapter will probably be up within a week. If you're interested, check it out! I'm pretty excited about it.

Once the water had grown cold in the bath, Laura simply allowed the pink tinged substance to circle down the drain, and then immediately filled it again with fresh, scalding water. This cycle had started hours ago. By this point, the brunette surmised that it was the early hours of the following day, but she just couldn’t bring herself to do anything else. She wanted to melt. She wanted to dissolve and slip away down the drain, never to be heard from again. 

Laura wanted to sleep. Her body was too weak to allow herself to rise. Her conscience was still too afraid to die so the risk of falling asleep and drowning in the tub wasn’t even considered. To close her eyes meant to stare into the blown out pupils of a dead man. What was the final scene Theo saw: her face probably. Laura’s set jaw and fearful eyes must have just affirmed for him that he wasn’t getting out of that alley alive. Laura had doomed them from the moment she entered the abandoned warehouse One dead, and another on the metaphorical chopping block. If she was going to be thrown in jail or thrown to the dogs, it couldn’t be a worse fate than Theo’s. To practically have been put to death by the one tasked to save you. 

Did Laura blame Carmilla? No, not really. Well, no. No, she didn’t. Did Carmilla know that Laura was inexperienced? Yes, that’s why she assigned Laura what was admittedly a lot less dangerous than the ones assigned to Danny and Kirsch. Did Carmilla know they were going to be set up? Well, Laura didn’t think so. Assuming Carmilla got to the bottom of it, it would seem as though this simple extraction was part of a much bigger scheme. A small part of Laura, maybe all of her actually, hoped that despite her resounding failure, the fact that she was involved at all would merit her staying in Berlin for what would inevitably be a much longer and in depth investigation. 

Laura hated the feeling of being a moth. She had never felt in control of her own life but Berlin was a raging bonfire and she just couldn’t help herself. 

Somewhere deeper in the room she shared with another American interloper, the phone rang, and some sheets rustled on the bed. A muffled conversation could be heard. It did not last very long, and with the click of the phone also came the soft slap of Danny’s feet on the floor as she approached the bathroom door. 

A few tentative knocks, then a groggily croaked out, “Laura?”

“It’s open.” Her voice sounded foreign. Was it from misuse, or was it the fact that in her mind, that voice belonged to someone who had never been shot at, had never been covered in someone else’s blood. She couldn’t say, however, that it belonged to someone who had never seen another person die. 

The door was cracked open slightly. Blue eyes quickly scanned the pile of clothes on the floor before landing on Laura’s form in the tub. 

“Oh sorry...I’ll just…tell you through the door… ” The redhead’s face was beginning to match her hair, but Laura couldn’t understand why. The two of them had slept together. They’d fucked on multiple occasions. It wasn’t like Danny was walking into a scandalizing scene of something she’d never seen before. Additionally, why did Laura suddenly feel so uncomfortably exposed and scrutinized. 

The door was once again shut. Laura finally managed to heave herself out of the water. She watched it go down the drain. The water was now completely clear, as it had been for hours, but the brunette knew she’d never completely get Theo’s blood off her hands. Laura took her time toweling off.

Danny continued, “Um, Mattie called. She’s, um, here. She wants to take you out for breakfast.”

This piqued the other woman’s interest, “With Perry, right?”

“Oh, um no. It’ll be just you and Mattie. Like I said, she’s here, but she said to take as long as you need. She’s just in the lobby. Um, Laura?” 

“Yes?”

She could hear the redhead swallow thickly before saying, “I know things have been kind of confusing between us, and I’m sure what happened last night didn’t help,” Laura closed her eyes tight and sucked in a sharp breathe, “but I’m still your friend if you, um, need someone to talk to, or something.” The brunette could tell that Danny was completely out of her element on this one. Usually so confident, her lover was practically pacing back and forth with her words. 

Before she could respond, Laura glanced down at the pile of clothes on the floor and her breathing suddenly sped up.

“Danny?!” It came out a bit more strangled than she would have liked, but currently the clothes in front of her felt like they were sucking all the air out of the room. 

Frantically, the other woman threw open the door. This time, Laura was modestly wrapped in a towel. 

“I-I need you to bring me some new clothes.” 

The redhead followed Laura’s gaze and immediately understood. She crossed the room, picked up the bloodstained garments and exited as swiftly as she entered. 

A knock on the door signaled Danny’s delivery. Laura opened the door to find a neatly folded pile of clothes on the floor: underwear, a bra, high-waisted jean shorts...and a Summer Society t-shirt. That shirt was not hers, but her lover’s. Summer Society was a skills building camp for teenage girls that Danny was involved in. She had been a counselor for upwards of five years at this point. The point was, the shirt obviously wasn’t Laura’s as it had the name “Lawrence” emblazoned on the back like a jersey. 

Why had Danny brought her this? Well, Laura knew why Danny had brought her this, but she wasn’t sure she liked it. Among all her glorious qualities, Danny Lawrence had a tendency to be jealous and overprotective. With this shirt, it was almost like she was laying a claim to Laura, like she was saying “I call dibs.” Any other day, Laura’s mind would sound an alarm to reject this advance and reaffirm that she belonged to nobody but herself. 

However, Laura’s conscience was in no state, place, or position to be picky, and maybe she once in a while it was ok to overlook the things one valued. More specifically, maybe, for a couple hours, she didn’t want to be Laura Hollis. This shirt was an enchanted item, a spell of transfiguration. She slipped it over her head. The cotton was soft against her skin. It was a nice reprieve from the more formal attire she had been sporting as of late. One moment ago she was Agent Laura Hollis, CIA fuck-up. Now, staring back at her in the mirror was Laura, Danny’s girlfriend. It was enough of a disguise, or more accurately, it would have to be if the brunette had any hope of facing anyone of anything outside the confines of the hotel room. 

She pulled socks on her feet, then laced up a pair of plain black Converse. Laura had emerged from the bathroom a brand new woman. 

Her voice still hadn’t completely caught up to her yet, “I’m going out. With Mattie.” Her voice sounded almost robotic. It was like flexing a muscle she didn’t even realize she had. “I’ll be back...when I get back.”

“Ok,” was floated in response to her from the bed. Laura looked over and saw Danny engrossed in a book. Or, supposedly engrossed. It was hard to miss her girlfriend’s eyes staring daggers into her as she departed. “I’ll see you later.” 

Laura stepped out of the room for the first time in what felt like an eon. In reality, it had been less than 12 hours since the tragedy had gone down. She mindlessly made her way down the stairs, thinking about nothing and everything at the same time. 

“Laura,” a familiar voice beckoned to her once she reached the lobby. Matska Belmonde was looking as elegant as ever, even in this more casual state. She wore a breezy white blouse and light blue French linen pants. Although she usually wore heels, her tan moccasins didn’t seem out of place either. “Are you ready to go?”

Laura nodded in response.  
“Well after you then,” Mattie made a sweeping gesture to usher Laura out the door and onto the street. The other woman rounded to the driver’s side of Scott the T-Bird from behind Laura. Every movement she made looked like she was beckoned by the wind, she flowed effortlessly from one place to another. 

“You know I like your shirt, Ms. Hollis.”

“Thank y-”

“Or should I say, Mrs. Lawrence?” A knowing but not really amused look was shot Laura’s way. At that moment, the American realized that the two of them were going to have much to talk about and given Mattie’s legal experience, it would not be difficult for her to suss out any information from Laura that she might want. With that, Laura resigned herself to whatever onslaught was coming and opened the passenger door, plopping down into the extremely comfortable leather seats.

“Can I at least know where you’re taking me?” Laura asked. The two of them had already been driving in silence for a few minutes before she gained the courage to speak. The silence wasn’t entirely uncomfortable though. Despite barely knowing the woman, Laura could tell that she was highly competent and basically had her best interest in mind. 

“The French quarter. Have you ever been to France?” 

“No actually this is my first time out of the country.” 

“Oh. Well...that’s exciting,” Mattie trailed off. It was obvious to Laura that she wasn’t the most comfortable with her current company. Laura couldn’t blame her. The only person she’d spent any alone time with besides Danny was Carmilla, and what had started out as a tense yet cordial evening had devolved into yet another argument. So there was that. Laura was also certain that Mattie was basically the “all seeing eye”. Therefore, speaking of Carmilla, the American was fairly convinced that Mattie was going to confront her about the other woman’s sister. It’s not like Laura was discreet with her feelings. The countess infuriated and intimidated her to no end, but it unnerved her how maybe Laura was not learning to so much as like Carmilla, but appreciate her. The moments when the two of them performed last rites together the night before played over and over in the brunette’s mind like it was the only thought in there. 

Matska Belmonde seemed like the kind of person one might want to have as a friend. Although, Matska Belmonde also seemed like the kind of person that didn’t really keep friends. Perry was obviously her best friend, and her relationship with Lafontaine could be categorized as friendly, but other than that, not many people to speak of. The same could really be said for all three siblings. It seemed like they knew a lot of people and had a lot of acquaintances, but outside familial ties, they didn’t keep a lot of close connections. 

Laura wanted to be Mattie’s friend. Perry was far more approachable, however. Perhaps she would have some insight into her wishes. 

“We have arrived,” the driver said. Before Laura could even react, Mattie was out of the car. Scrambling for the door handle, the brunette burst out the passenger side. A mumbled “be gentle” could be heard from her companion. Before them stood a storefront in a strip mall. It was fairly unassuming, but the sign spoke volumes. “Pho-king Vietnamese” was emblazoned in yellow against a dark red background. The two women went inside. 

A short, older Vietnamese woman came to greet them, “Welcome to Pho-king Vietnamese how may I- oh no not you again. Last time you were you almost ate me out of the place and broke a chair.”

Mattie laughed and laid her hand on the shorter woman’s shoulder. It was slapped away. The woman’s sour look hadn’t left her face.

“It’s alright Pham I’m not the hungry one today. And how could I have broken a chair? You have bench seating.”

Pham threw the two an incredulous look, but nonetheless gestured for them to sit. The interior matched the sign outside. Lots of gold and maroon. Jade dragons of various sizes lurked in corners. 

Laura sat across from Mattie at one of the tables, “Why have you brought me here?”

“Because it’s good fucking food.”

“Yeah ok. But I’m also confused as to why you wanted to take me out at all. Not thinking about ditching Perry are you?” Laura smiled, but her attempt to inject humor into an extremely awkward situation was not well received. 

Mattie’s eyes flared and it looked like it physically pained her to stop herself from suplexing Laura into the table. Laura suspected that in terms of litigation, Mattie was quite successful. With a face like that, any jury would be scared to move against her. 

“Don’t you dare joke about that. You don’t even know-”

“You’re right I don’t even know,” the American retorted. She suddenly had realized that she truly did not know, but it wasn’t from lack of trying. These people said they trusted her, but then failed to back it up. The face in front of her faltered. Mattie probably didn’t expect meak, inexperienced Laura to contain any other emotion other than confusion. 

Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Pham return to them, but seeing their mental smackdown, attempted to escape the crossfire. Laura was going to let her. Mattie wasn’t feeling so gracious. 

“No Pham, we’re ready to order. I’m not getting anything, but bring dear Laura, IT.” 

Pham looked nervous, if not resigned, “Are you sure?”

Mattie still hadn’t broken her iron-clad gaze on Laura, even though the brunette had by then looked away and was low staring pleadingly at their host. 

“Yes.”

“So be it.”

Pham walked away. Laura stared at her back for a moment before turning angrily back at her companion. “I cannot fucking stand it when people make decisions for me. But ever since I got to this godforsaken town, that’s all that’s happened.”

The lawyer in front of her looked bemused. Laura suspected that they were about to discuss the reason the two of them were here at all. This location was private. There were no other customers at this early hour. In fact, Laura could see the door from where they sat. The hours were printed on it, and the restaurant didn’t even open until noon. It was currently nine in the morning. Mattie just had that much sway, she supposed. 

The German began questioning her witness, “Oh really? And what times did you feel as though someone had made a decision on your behalf?”

“Wha- ALL THE TIME? You just did. Carmilla’s done it twice now-”

“Ah Carmilla. Hasn’t she been ever so accommodating to you so far?” 

The question took some of the wind out of Laura’s sail. It was unexpected that someone would even make a claim like that, “Um...no. And I don’t know why you would even suggest that.”

“You are referencing both your first journey over the wall, as well as your assignment as relating to the disaster that was last night?” Laura nodded in response, still not liking where this was going. Mattie continued, “Did Carmilla not give you an out on both those occasions?”

Laura went back in her memory. Unfortunately for her, Mattie was right. Carmilla had allowed her to say no on both occasions. In her mind, the countess’ overall demeanor overshadowed the fact that she had sought out Laura’s consent in the matters in question. On both occasions, Laura had given it willingly.  
“I suppose you are right.” Mattie looked pleased, but before she could respond, Laura cut her off, “But what would have happened if I said no? Would Carmilla have even accepted that?”

“Yes.”

“How could you know that?”

“I know my sister and I know what she’s doing.”

Laura felt herself grow angry again. “Why are you being so cryptic,” she snapped, “Why is everyone unable to just state something outright? I asked Lafontaine about the story of how you and Perry met, and they barely gave me anything. Like what the hell. Is your sex life fucking classified?”

Mattie regarded her for a long moment, then smiled as if recalling the story of how she met her fiance, “That’s not Lafontiane’s story to tell. In fact, Perry tells it best, once you get a couple pints in her. I’ll make you a deal.”

“What.”

“You and I have an honest conversation here, and in exchange, I’ll make sure that before you depart Germany, you will get the chance to learn the story of how we met from the mouth of a drunk Lola Perry herself.” The German woman held out her hand to shake. The American took it. She liked jovial Mattie. But as soon as that mirth appeared, the liturgical glare returned, as did Pham with the food. 

A bowl of noodle soup was placed in front of Laura. It looked normal enough, except for the fact that the entire dish was bright red. 

“Mattie what is this.”

A smirk appeared on an angular face, “It’s official title is “Your Pho-king funeral”. I brought you here because we need to talk and you need to have a good cry. If anything’s going to illicit both those things, it’s this delicacy. Try it.”

Laura tentatively took a bite. Her brain immediately exploded and tears welled in her eyes. Holy shit. Apparently self-immolation via noodle was possible. Mattie looked upon her captive’s pain with a malicious joy.

“Now. Think back to those two events we mentioned earlier. Who else had something to say?”

Laura could barely stay conscious, much less think. Nonetheless, she mustered up the mental fortitude to speak. “...Danny.” It came out in a sickly wheeze.  
“Correct, and what was her role?”

Laura smacked her head on the table once she realized what Mattie was getting at. It came nowhere close to the level of pain manifesting her mouth. It was actually her girlfriend who had attempted to answer for her in both cases.

“I get it. You want me to admit that Danny is overbearing and that Carmilla is some “guru” that will help me reach my full potential. Carmilla is looking out for me. What is it about her anyway? What gave her some free pass to treat people like shit and then get out of it by being mysterious and charismatic?” 

Mattie’s grin widened as if Laura hadn’t just insulted her only sister, “First of all, Carmilla doesn’t treat people like shit. She just doesn’t like Danny and was wary of you at first.” The surety of it all. From the way Mattie spoke, to the heat of the noodles, it made the tears welling in Laura’s eyes threaten to fall. 

Her captor continued, “Second of all, you misunderstand me. But then again I didn’t really give you the chance to discern my intentions. I think you would do well to listen to Danny.” 

“Why.”

The other woman folded her arms on top of the table and leaned closer to the brunette, “Look, Laura. You may think that I’m mysterious and unknowable like my sister, but I like you. So over time, you will find that I’m not so unknowable at all. I’m planting a seed in your mind that maybe you should just go home. I’m not telling you to outright. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want you around a little longer. I’m just saying that, even though I get that you and Danny probably aren’t going to work out.” At that Laura attempted to protest, but Mattie just help up a hand to stop her and continued, “In this power vacuum of a city, don’t you think it would be safer to align yourself with the devil you know?”

“Are you explicitly telling me to be wary of Carmilla?”

“Yes. For her sake as much as yours.”

“As her sister, wouldn’t you be able to unshroud the mystery of Carmilla’s past to me? I just want to understand her.” It was getting harder for Laura to see. Tears started to slowly drip down her face, “I don’t blame her for what happened yesterday. But I still hold the right to be emotional about it. A man died in my arms last night, Mattie.” That’s when the waterworks really turned on. 

Mattie looked at her not with pity, but understanding, “Yeah. A man died in your arms last night. It’s ok to cry about it. That’s why I brought you here.” 

“Does Carmilla know you’re here?”

“No, but not because I’m trying to hide anything from her. It just didn’t come up.” The German took a couple moments. Laura could practically hear the gears turning away in her head. Finally she spoke, choosing her words very carefully, “Laura, a-about last night. Look,” she guiltily looked away for a moment, “You know I’m a lawyer, so I’m kind of in tune with these kinds of things. Look, Laura, what I’m trying to say is, really, um, be prepared for what’s coming. I don’t mean like some underground crime ring that you’re about to go to war with, although that’s a possibility knowing the territory.”

“Mattie just spit it out already.” 

“Unless circumstances change, or someone intervenes, the British intelligence community is probably going to attempt to take legal action against you.”

“I really fucked things up for myself, didn’t I.”

The two women stared at each other for a long moment. For unknown reasons, Laura continued to shove noodles in her mouth. It wasn’t like they were good. 

“Laura you don’t have to finish those you know.”

Laura quirked an eyebrow and tried a different tactic, “Does Perry have any-”

“No. We’re not going there.”

“Fine. I think I want to leave now.” The two of them got up. Mattie slapped a stack of marks on the table and they walked back to the car. Despite the tone of conversation they were having, the weather had opened up to be warm and blissful. It seemed like everytime Laura thought her good will for Berlin had run out, it came back around carrying little gifts. 

“I want you to take me to Silas’,” Laura requeted, hopping into the passenger seat.

“Why?”

“Because I’m going to try to stake out your sister.” It was a resolute response. Mattie didn’t even try to deny her. Maybe they both realized that the upcoming confrontation was a necessary evil. Or maybe Mattie still just knew something Laura didn’t. Probably the latter, but still, Laura didn’t care. She wanted to catch the Countess unaware. 

So they drove again in silence, and when Mattie dropped her at the cafe, there was still no more exchange of words. Laura watched the incredibly sleek car wind its way back into the writhing guts of the city. Between them, there was nothing left to say. For now at least.  
Laura had suspected that Mattie would make a powerful ally. But now that she tentatively was one, she wondered if the other woman would ever do anything besides dish out cryptic advice. Only time would tell. 

Graz crept up behind her, “Can I get you anything, Miss. Laura?” The man’s lilting accent floated far onto the otherwise quiet sidestreet. 

The sun reflected brightly off the sunglasses Laura slipped out of her pocket. The trees cast intiquest shadows onto the street below. There was no movement in or around Carmilla’s brownstone from what Laura could see from her vantage point outside the cafe. She signed, resigned, and tapped her knuckles against the metal tabletop. 

“Yes. Bring me any newspaper in English you have, as well as a macchiato. And keep em’ coming. It seems as though I’m going to be here for awhile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from “Africa” by Toto 
> 
> As always I love hearing from you guys! 
> 
> So feel free to leave comments and kudos!
> 
> I'm going to tentatively say the next update for this fic will come around the beginning of June, so I'll try to stick to that. 
> 
> Check out my new fic too!


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